Lost Control
by SpacePirateGirl
Summary: One deal can change a person's life. Sasuke, the leader of his "gang" and Sakura's major enemy, has forced her to make a pact: she must do everything he commands until the end of high school. As more dead ends unfold, can Sakura still learn to love him?
1. Chapter 1

"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?  
Holding too tightly,  
Afraid to loose control._  
'_Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you.  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,  
And every second I waste is more than I can take.  
I've become so numb,  
I can't feel you there."_

—Linkin Park

**Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl  
**

_Chapter One_

Wednesday had always been a normal day.

It wasn't normal for me.

From the time I got up, to the time I got to class, I knew something was wrong. Maybe it was some scent in the air, maybe some mood set by the facial expressions of everybody around me. But somewhere in my heart, I _knew_ today was not going to be normal.

We were playing volleyball; it was that time of year, the time when the snow was slushy and melting, the time right before Prom night. Two more weeks, and it would be time. I really hoped that Naruto would ask Hinata out. I knew how much she loved him, even though he had a crush on me. They were my only friends, and I would be forced to stay home from Prom without a dance partner.

But I would be happy.

Hinata deserved Naruto. She was kind, caring, the type of girl who _always_ gave a shit about people. Definitely not the type to attend Konoha High, the worst school in the state, the school where all the "bad kids" went, or the ones who were poor. Hinata was high-class, but she wasn't one of the bad ones either. Her cousin, Hyuga Neji, was—he had been sent here, and Hinata had refused to leave him to come alone. Her selfish bastard of a cousin, and she still cared. I admired Hinata for that.

Uchiha Sasuke, my worst enemy at school, was on the opposite volleyball team. Neji was his friend, as was a kid named Kiba. Uchiha was popular, and I knew he had strong ties with Ino's popular group as well. Most of the time he acted like a two-year-old throwing temper tantrums whenever he didn't get what he wanted. But still he was a teenager; his tantrums tended to be worse than a little whining. I tended to lose control of myself and attack him when his insults cut to deep. My most frequent class was the nurse's office or detention. However bad my injuries were—it was really all the same.

Sasuke smirked devilishly at me, and I knew he had another plan to tease me, to mock me. He always did. But Wednesday—this Wednesday—his look was different. His plan was deeper, and more suffocating; I knew that from his eyes, his cold, black onyx eyes staring politely and ruthlessly at my scrawny and small form. Something was off.

A ball hit me on a head before I could remember to bump it.

"Hey, forehead girl, like, pay attention!" Ino, a former friend of mine, glared sharply at me for the lost point in volleyball. We had been Kindergarten friends, elementary school friends, and even freshmen year friends. But after her road had morphed into cheerleading, I had befriended Naruto and Hinata instead for sophomore year. She never seemed the same since then—and neither did Sasuke.

This year, Junior year, she was top cheerleader of her grade and the school, and I smiled at the thought that I was no longer her friend. Grades were more important, after all. I didn't want to find myself stuck in the same hole my parents were in, working two, full-time jobs with hardly a spare moment and still getting such a low income. I wanted a life, and that was how school had become important. "Maybe you should pay more attention in class, Ino-pig!" I threw a warning glance at her.

The volleyball game kept on until either of the two teams could win by scoring one point.

Directly across from me, Uchiha Sasuke was at the front line, smirking at me with the same uncanny premonition that something about today was different. I glared firmly back. He always got that look on his face when he came up with a new way to insult me or bully me, and I always stood strongly up to his game. But what was his game this time?

"Sakura-chan," he began, his voice mockingly polite, "do be careful not to break one of your nails when the ball comes your way."

I glared but kept my own voice falsely pleasant, as well. "Oh, don't worry, Sasuke-san. It's _your_ nails you'll be crying over shortly."

His smirk vanished instantly, though he did not have a plausible retort at the ready. I wanted to laugh at his shock, laugh at the image of him crying like a girl over a broken nail, but I kept calm, only allowing a single smile to surface.

Hinata was serving from Sasuke's side, and I saw the ball come straight over my head as Ino bumped it back over. The ball was about to touch the floor until Hyuga Neji bumped it, and Kiba spiked it over. I set it.

Sasuke spiked it back, and Naruto bumped it. Naruto—I knew why he was sent here, too. His parents weren't exactly poor. In fact, he no longer had parents at all. He was an orphan. I had heard rumors that his mom and dad had died in a car crash when he was fourteen, and every so often, or rather as in now, I saw the lost look in his deep, sea-blue eyes. His orphanage didn't really care about education, and so they sent all the children in their custody to Konoha High . . .

No, I had to pay attention—my thoughts couldn't get lost from the game again.

Our team was losing the volleyball match because we couldn't grab the offensive. We were just defending; sooner or later, our opponents would find a hole in the barricade we had so carefully prepared. And I _needed _to win. The pressure of knowing that everyone would blame me if we lost boiled under my skin. And with my temper, no one would escape: detention would be a likely course. The ball dangled above the net. Determination took hold of my body. All thoughts disappeared.

I jumped up to spike.

At first, I wasn't sure what had happened. I found myself on my butt with Naruto, hovering over me, as Hinata ran to see if I was all right. The opposing team's members were laughing their heads of at me with the exception of Sasuke, who was smirking at me, his face telling me clearly, "that's what you get for being a bitch." My team was groaning in anger, and insulting me for the lost point—and thus, the lost game. Then finally the pain hit, and I clutched the top of my head in pain, flinching when I realized my arm also ached right down to the bone.

"Sakura-chan." Naruto trembled with rage and worry with his arm on my back comfortingly.

Hinata finally reached me, and knelt down. "Sakura-san, are you okay?"

God, it hurt, but I managed not to cry. Other causes of pain had been much, much worse before. Tackling three boys at once when I had hardly any physical strength at all was a dead giveaway that I would have more than a couple bruises. And this was only a bruise on my head, right?

My arm still ached, and I took back what I was thinking. Surely this pain I was feeling didn't mean my arm was broken . . . Without my right arm, I wouldn't be able to keep up with schoolwork!

"W-what happened?" asked Hinata nervously. She had been too far back to see.

But wincing as I moved my arm, I shrugged. I didn't really have any idea either. I glanced at Naruto for an explanation, but his deep, blue gaze locked angrily on Sasuke. "You guys have nothing better to do, do you?" he demanded, still trembling.

Sasuke smirked again. "And what if we don't? What are you going to do about it?"

Naruto's hands shook as he began to lose his mind, the anger overwhelming his usual senses.

"Hey, hey, Naruto," I said, snapping my fingers in front of his face with my unharmed hand. "It's okay. I'm fine. Just . . . let it go."

"They're always doing this to you! Somebody's got to stop them!"

"Not now," I whispered, "not now. Tell me what happened first."

Hinata nodded in agreement, always hoping to avoid watching her crush take on Sasuke, Neji, and Kiba on his own. Three against one was definitely not safe. And at Konoha High, I knew it was always best to play it safe.

Naruto calmed down and helped me to my feet. "You were going to spike it, right?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yeah, what happened after that?"

"Sasuke jumped up to spike it, too." His blue eyes still glared at the Uchiha while he spoke. "He's stronger than you, so your arm just kinda . . ." He looked at my arm, noticing how I couldn't move it before continuing. "It just kinda snapped, and he pretty much spiked your head afterwards, instead of the ball."

The coach was running toward me, ready to send me to the nurse's office—again. It seemed I always landed in trouble like this, at least once a day, but I kept my face calm, despite the pain and anger threatening to throw me off balance. It was normal. Today was like any other Wednesday, and I still didn't understand what made it different.

"What happened here?" the coach Anko demanded.

Sasuke was first to speak before I could even open my mouth to explain. "It was an accident. We both spiked the ball at the same time, and she got hurt."

Hinata shook her head slightly, and Naruto let out a growl of anger. They knew this was no accident, and so did I. One would think after so many times of these "accidents" that Anko would believe my story, instead of his. But no, Sasuke just had to be extremely athletic and perfect and everything a P.E. teacher would want. It was only natural Anko would believe him.

I didn't even bother arguing with his story.

"All right. You—" she pointed to me— "are going to the nurse's office, and you—" this time, her finger landed on Sasuke— "are taking her."

No. Sasuke couldn't take me to the nurse's office. This was insane. This was unbelievable! Did the teacher _want_ me to get beaten up? Fortunately Sasuke also disliked the idea. I could tell that much when he eyed me angrily and shook his head. "Why do _I_ have to? It was an accident."

"If it was an accident," Anko shot back as she shrugged her shoulders casually, "you should be more willing to apologize by taking her there, shouldn't you?"

Sasuke's only answer was a frown. He was trapped between telling the truth to Anko and taking me to the nurse's office, trapped between a rock and a hard place.

"I can take her," Naruto suggested, also being an athletic teenager placed among Anko's favorites.

"No, that's okay, Naruto," said Anko coolly. "I think Sasuke should."

Sasuke's frown enhanced, and he strode over to me, holding out a hand. I didn't really have a choice but to take it. The minute Naruto let me go, I would fall back down. My bottom hurt really badly. So I allowed him to grab my arm and leaned heavily on him so I wouldn't fall.

Saying my last prayers to myself, I bid a silent goodbye to Naruto and Hinata as I hoped I would make it to the nurse's office in one piece. Last time Sasuke had taken me there had not turned out well, and with that in my mind, I understood that I was more likely to end up dead than on a nice, soft bed.

But Sasuke led me down the hallway for a long time, hardly hinting in any way that he wanted to hurt me. For a moment I believed I would be safe, but that was highly wishful thinking. Suddenly Sasuke pressed me up against the wall, gripping my turtleneck shirt in his hands and leaning his face close to mine. I winced when my arm hit the wall, too, but said nothing, knowing a single noise could set his attitude out of control.

"It's your own fault, you know," he muttered darkly. "If you hadn't insulted me—"

"If _you_ hadn't insulted _me_," I cut in, my temper getting the best of me.

He shoved me harder onto the wall. "Let me finish," he warned softly yet menacingly.

I closed my mouth and promised myself to keep it shut until he asked me a question.

"Basically I have a proposal for you." His onyx eyes inspected me fully before he continued. "You don't have to decide now. In fact, I'll give you until tomorrow morning to decide."

Hoping to vanish into the very wall he held me against, I shrunk back. Sasuke with a proposal was something to be wary of. "What do you want?" I demanded with a whisper.

"I will stop bullying you around, and so will Neji, Kiba, and the rest of my friends," he began, his voice taunting and amused. "You will be on the road to popularity, too."

Being popular wasn't really my thing, but I had been hurt one time too many times to forget about the second part of the deal he was making. "What about Naruto and Hinata?" If anything, I really hoped his deal would apply to my only two friends, as well. I would do anything to keep them from being bullied—especially Hinata, teased for her shyness and awkward appearance. I would think Neji would take pity on her, being her cousin and all. But aside from their looks, I never could have guessed they were related.

"No. Right now this deal only applies to you," Sasuke answered coldly. "On the downside, if you don't agree to this, we'll only start picking on you worse. This is a one-time opportunity, and you have until tomorrow morning to decide."

Basically I knew what he meant. His deal could either save me or ruin my life for good. I didn't know how they could pick on me more than they already were, but if he said so, I believed him. It was hard not to listen to the threats of my worst enemy of Konoha High. "So what's the catch?" I asked suspiciously. He wouldn't just stop annoying me if I asked him to . . .

At first, he didn't answer. He merely stared at me for a while before he said anything at all. "You're a pretty enough girl. Maybe not as pretty as some girls going to this school, but you're better than most of the cheerleaders, at least."

I almost smiled at his insult to Ino and her "friends," but I wasn't in the mood to sit here forever, waiting for him to finish what he started. "What's the catch?" I repeated with my voice almost as icy as his. I was so ready to agree to his deal, no matter what the catch was. A life without being teased or laughed at every second was tempting, and I could hardly refuse.

A smirk tainted his face as he looked me directly in the eye, saying nothing for only a moment. "You have to hang out with me and my friends. And not only that, but you have to do whatever I say for the rest of high school. Basically you'll become mine to use. All the time."

I felt tears spring to my eyes, once I realized what he meant. Uchiha Sasuke wanted me as an object, as someone to manipulate, possible even as his girlfriend . . . I pushed the thoughts away and debated my options. Either my life would be ruined or my life would be ruined. I _had _no choice. But maybe Sasuke would be a little nicer to me if I accepted his deal.

There was still one thing I needed to beg of him though. "What about Naruto and Hinata?" I asked again. "Will you stop bothering them if I agree?"

He shrugged and loosened his grasp on my neck, assuming he had my full attention—which he did. "I suppose it's a fair trade. I mean, I probably won't let you talk to them anymore, so it would be nice to also leave them alone as a reward, wouldn't it?"

The tears started to fall from my eyes, and hoping the ache in my head wouldn't make me collapse, I leaned against the wall. I could sense he needed a little more of a push. "I'll agree to your deal right here and now if you promise you won't pick on them anymore." My friends were what mattered to me most in this Hell hole of a life. I would do anything to make Sasuke leave them alone.

"Sure, why not," he remarked disinterestedly. "There's other people to tease."

We remained silent for a quite a few seconds until he looked at me for approval. I nodded weakly, though I was hardly sure what I was getting myself into. "I'll agree to your terms," I breathed. Today had seemed perfectly normal, perfectly the same as any other day. But it had turned out so different with Sasuke promising to leave me and my friends alone, with me allowing myself to become utterly his. I shivered involuntarily. It hurt to think about my future.

"Good," Sasuke finally said, and held out a hand to bring me off the wall. He led me toward the nurse's office, having complete and perpetual control over me. Before we entered our destination, he turned to me, his eyes full of warning. "Don't tell your friends what happened," he told me. "That's my first order for you."

"What?" I cried out. "Why? They'll think I hate them . . ."

He silenced me by patting me on the shoulder. "You can change your mind about the deal any time." His tone was clearly amused.

I kept quiet after that. I wondered what Hinata would think . . . that I had abandoned her, just like I had during freshman year when I had become Ino's friend? But she would be too nervous to ask me about it . . . And Naruto! He would be outraged when he saw me with Sasuke! He would call me a traitor! I wanted to sob hysterically, to beg the rich Uchiha not to do this to me, but nevertheless, I was careful to erase all emotion from my face.

Sasuke was toying with a strand on my hair while I thought. "Why do you dye your hair? It only makes people pick on you."

I wanted to yank away from his hand before I realized he would consider it "going back on the deal." For the first time in a long while, I felt like crying but couldn't bring any tears to my eyes. They always came against my own will when I didn't want them, but when I did needed them, they were nowhere to be seen. "I don't dye my hair," I answered smoothly, trying to keep my inner temper under control. Adrenaline was rushing through my body, my body that would give anything for a fight. But Naruto and Hinata were depending on this deal I had made with the devil.

Disbelief at what I said in his eyes, Sasuke's hand moved away from the strand of my pink hair. "Let it grow out," he told me as he began to walk away. "It's too short a length to play with at the moment."

If I hadn't regained my balance, I would have fallen when he had released his hold on my body, the only thing that had been keeping me on my own two feet. Luckily my arm no longer hurt, and my headache was beginning to lessen. Maybe I would be okay to go to my next class after the bell rang.

Uncertainty plaguing me from all directions, I entered the nurse's office. I knew very well that Sasuke's sudden control of my life was only just beginning.

* * *

**A/N:** Sorry, I meant to get it out this morning, but I was _so _busy because my mom decided to go shopping for costumes on the last day. -rolls eyes- Sheesh. Anyway, um... I rated this M for swearing and sex at times (not too much except in _one _chapter). And also, this, I wrote when I was an idiot, so... definitely not my best, but I'm doing my best to revise it as much as possible. I hope it doesn't suck too bad. :-/ Anyway, any advice would be helpful!! Thanks!!


	2. Chapter 2

"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?  
Holding too tightly,  
Afraid to loose control._  
'_Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you.  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,  
And every second I waste is more than I can take.  
I've become so numb,  
I can't feel you there."_

—Linkin Park

**Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl**

_Chapter Two_

The last class of the day, the last class where Sasuke could torment me, the last class directly after P.E—Pre-calculus. Ever since I had befriended Hinata and Naruto, I had grown to love math, and due to my great reverence of the subject, the teacher Kakashi Hatake had allowed me to get into it, even though my grades had been low during my time with Ino.

Except today, I felt like anyone but myself. I hadn't even gotten a chance to say a quick goodbye to Hinata and Naruto. Sasuke had been waiting for me at the door, making sure I wouldn't be able to slip past him into the classroom and speak to my friends.

Hatake Kakashi allowed his students to sit wherever they wanted, and he was, perhaps, the only teacher who understood how Sasuke and his friends picked on me. I always had sat next to Hinata and Naruto, since the beginning of the year, and I began to head toward my regular seat until Sasuke stopped me by placing a hand on my shoulder.

"You're sitting with me," he explained, his voice dark to my ears.

I ignored the startled glances of Naruto and Hinata. Their eyes were painful to my heart. They didn't believe that Sasuke could have forced me into this; they only saw me with him freely, without anger. Yet I knew only the most meticulous of people could see a slight tint of grief on my face.

Sasuke chose his spot near the back, and ordered me to sit beside to him. I obeyed. In a class with possibly forty students, the bad section sat as far back as possible; the mediocre group, such as Ino, would sit in the second and third row, and the nerds would sit near the front. The worst half of school just didn't show up. I felt strange sitting so far away from the board.

His face beyond angry or mad, Naruto took large steps toward me. I stayed still as he finally reached my desk. "What the hell do you think you're doing, Sakura-chan?" he demanded.

"Uzumaki-kun, please stop." Hinata latched onto his arm. Even after a year of being her friend, I was still highly impressed that she no longer fainted at the mere sight of him, and now she was _touching_ him—progress for sure.

Naruto shook her hands off his arm. "Sakura-chan! Why are you sitting with _him_?" His finger landed upon Sasuke sharply.

I kept my eyes on my desk, avoiding looking into his and spilling all the truth that would ruin this deal.

"She's here because she wants to be obviously."

Naruto turned to the Uchiha as he allowed all his vehemence to spill out at the sight of him. "That's not the Sakura-chan I know! You did something to her, you creep. You brainwashed her or something when you took her to the nurse's office last class. You're a jerk, a total jerk! Leave her alone!"

"Don't you see your hurting her feelings?"

"_You're_ the one hurting her!"

"Naruto," I began softly, only loud enough for him to hear, "please stop. I've chosen new friends." The words were ripped from my throat, my throat that had a steady lump rising in it, choking me, forcing me to want to cry. I kept my eyes on my desk. Looking at my old friends would only cause me to stutter, and they wouldn't believe me.

I felt them inspect me and make sure I had not been beaten up or threatened. I knew they would be satisfied. I was in a perfectly healthy condition at the moment, despite my aching head and my hurt arm—but those they already knew about. Finally Naruto gave a small grunt and walked away. Hinata, on the other hand, stayed. "Is your arm better?"

I nodded. Hinata had always been like this; trying to please everyone, even though her own heart longed for something else. She didn't really want to talk to me.

"Just go sit with Naruto."

I was right. She was gone.

Hatake Kakashi finally entered the classroom—late by five minutes as always. His nose was in his favorite book that he claimed had to do with concepts "incomprehensive for children too young." He set the book down on his desk as his eyes tilted in a smile. "Sorry, I was late. I was lost on the path of life—"

The class groaned in response.

He inspected the seating arrangement of the day and frowned when his eyes landed on me. I stared at my hands. When I looked up, fortunately his frown had disappeared, and he returned to teaching the new lesson.

I promised myself to pay attention and do well, despite where I was sitting. But I soon found a folded piece of paper—a note—in my face almost immediately after the class had begun. At first I decided not to open it until Sasuke suddenly whispered from his seat, "Are you going back on the deal?"

It was at that moment that I fully registered what had happened. I was trapped. I had to do every single thing he said without question. I couldn't have an opinion anymore. I couldn't do well in school. I had to become one of the bad students. I was trapped. Reluctantly and not without tears, I opened the note, and we began to pass it back and forth.

_Don't worry_, Sasuke had written. _Your friends will get over you._

_Okay. _Without knowing him that well and by being under his clutches, I couldn't really say anything. Would "why are you doing this to me" be too much, or would a simple "how have you been doing" sound too corny? We weren't friends, even if he wanted to be. I was merely stuck with him, and he was basing friendship on threats and deals.

_You don't have to be so scared, you know. Talk to me._

Of course. He wanted to pretend we'd been buddies since kindergarten. But still I had no choice but to do what he said. Luckily for me, it seemed as if he didn't care what I told him on this note for now, so none of it applied to our deal.

_Why are you doing this to me?_ I demanded, and sent the note back to him.

_I thought I told you._

_-Told me what? _I asked, putting a tiny dash when I was writing since the note was getting a little confusing to read.

_You're a pretty enough girl, and you don't give a shit about me. Besides, I really needed a girlfriend. Every girl in the school is stalking me, and it's really annoying._

_-So you decided that since I'm one of the only ones who's not stalking you and since I'm the prettiest out of all of them, you think you can ruin my life?_

_Basically._

His words made me fume with anger and blush at the same time. I had never really considered myself beautiful, and now Sasuke, the hottest guy in the school, was telling me he thought I was pretty? I didn't know what to say, so I chose to change the subject. Besides, this question had been bothering me for quite a long while.

_-Why do you come to this school? I've heard your parents are rich._

A reply didn't come for a long time, and I pondered whether or not that had been going too far.

But finally he wrote back. _It's none of your business._

_-Okay._

Another long gap of note passing occurred between us, but finally he returned the piece of paper.

_It's because they don't think they can afford a better private school._

Hell, his parents were upper-_upper_ high class. _-Why the hell not?_

He was reluctant to answer, I could tell. The way his onyx eyes stared at the note, the way my questions seemed to stab him with a million needles. He almost seemed as if he wanted to cry, which was not something you'd see Sasuke Uchiha do on a daily basis.

_My older brother's going to Princeton. Without a scholarship. My parents don't like to spend too much money._

_-Oh. Sorry._

_Not your problem._

As much as I hated him, as much as I loathed him with a desperate passion, I couldn't help but also pity him. From what he had said. Going to a college like Princeton without a scholarship was hugely expensive. And thrifty parents would only create an assumption of being bankrupt, even if they really weren't. Rich people didn't necessarily believe Princeton was cheap. It was more of a learned-by-raising type of thing.

_-Um, so, I didn't know you had a brother._

_Can we talk about something else?_

_-Yeah. Like what?_

_Do your parents expect you to be home tonight?_

_-No. _My parents cared, at least, but they were busy too much of the time. If only everyone could have a combination of rich parents and loving parents, but I knew from experience parents like that just didn't exist.

_Come to my house then._

It was an order. I could tell from a mile away. He wasn't even asking anything.

_-Hey, if you wanted a friend when you came to me, then it's not going to work between us. I hate you. And since you don't know what real friends are like, you can't really give me orders on how to be one._

_Not your problem_, he wrote again.

_-Uh, __yeah__. It is._

"Sakura Haruno, would you be so kind as to answer my question?" Kakashi suddenly asked as if he knew I wasn't paying any attention at all.

I felt heat rush to my face as I stared dumbly at him. I had no idea. "Uh . . ." Glancing at the problem on the board, I tried to derive the answer as quickly as possible, but he knew if I had been paying attention, I wouldn't need to. "I don't know," I answered honestly after at least thirty seconds had passed.

The class laughed at me, and more blood rushed to my face.

"I'd like to speak with you after class," Kakashi declared and returned to the lesson.

Tears rushed to my eyes, but I drove them back down.

_I'll get them to stop laughing at you soon_, Sasuke had promised when he sent the note back to me.

_-Would you mind so much if I paid attention in class?_

_Yes. All I have to do is bribe Kakashi, and he'll give you a passing grade._

_-Kakashi isn't like that!_

_Everyone is like that. I promise you. It doesn't matter if you pay attention._

_-It matters to me! I want a job! A good job, not one of those lame jobs that got me stuck going here! I want to go to college._

_Tough luck. Can we get back to the conversation?_

More tears came, and I couldn't stop them this time. Why did my life have to be so ruined? Why? _-I'm coming to your house tonight. We'll talk then._

I didn't read any further messages he sent to me. I raised my hand several times to answer questions. I made sure I understood the lesson completely. I wanted Kakashi to know that I really cared about my future.

Soon class ended, and I went to talk to Kakashi as Sasuke waited for me to come outside the classroom after I finished.

"Sakura," Kakashi began slowly, "are you sure you're ready for this class?"

I had promised I would work hard, but with my life taking an unexpected turn, I wasn't so sure anymore. Maybe I could somehow sort things out with Sasuke before my life plummeted to the ground. "I'm sorry about today. It won't happen again," I said, deciding to change my mind later if I had to.

He nodded understandingly. "Good. I'll see you tomorrow then."

Leaving the classroom quickly, I struggled not to wince when Sasuke grabbed my wrapped up arm and pulled me down the hallway. "Sasuke," I began slowly, "my arm . . ."

He glanced at me, frowning in confusion, but finally understanding came to his eyes. Sasuke released my arm and grabbed my other one. I didn't know where we were going. He pulled me along toward a place I hardly ever went to—the cafeteria. Usually I liked to eat outside where there were less people to tease me, so being led to a table in the cafeteria was a strange occurrence.

Sasuke sat down near a group of people and told me to do so as well. Neji and Kiba were there, and I nearly bristled at the mere sight of them. Sai, another one of Sasuke's friends, was there, and next to him sat Ino, leaning on his shoulder.

"Sasuke-kun, what the hell is forehead girl doing here?" Ino demanded, jumping off Sai the moment I sat down. It seemed that her crush on Sasuke had not dissipated, even though she was currently Sai's girlfriend.

Sasuke ignored the blonde and looked at each of his friends individually. "Everybody, meet Haruno Sakura, my new girlfriend."

I suppressed shivers when Sasuke placed his arm around my shoulders while he spoke. Everybody who heard had his jaw dropped to the floor in a moment. Ino's blue eyes were the first to grow angry. "Forehead girl? Your girlfriend?" She gasped as if she were about to faint. I didn't blame her. She would be hysterical that Sasuke was no longer up for grabs.

"You're joking," Sai guessed, though his face was blank.

Sasuke shook his head, and whispered under his breath to me; "Make them believe it."

Biting my lip, I tried to smile at them, to tell them it wasn't a joke, no matter how much I wished it _was_ just a dream. "Yeah, he asked me," I said, "and I said yes. We're together now."

Kiba was the first to grin. "Ha, never thought you'd end up with your worst enemy, Sasuke."

Sasuke didn't answer with anything else but another smirk. A few moments of silence passed before he spoke. "Ino."

She still appeared quite stunned, and her shoulders were quite tense. I could tell since her shirt was spaghetti strapped and tight, leaving nothing hidden from the eye. "Yeah?" Her voice was tiny and high-pitched.

"When are you going shopping again?" he asked, icily daring her to disbelieve the declaration of his girlfriend.

"Um . . . tomorrow probably. My mom finally paid me for helping her with the flower shop, and I'm tired of my old clothes. Why?"

"Take Sakura with you. Help her choose some new clothes."

I frowned at Sasuke in surprise. Why would he do that? Not only did he want me to become his girlfriend, do everything he said, grow my hair out, but he also wanted me to change my entire wardrobe? I detested shopping with a passion. Besides, it wasn't as if I had the money for it anyway.

"You got it." Ino eyed my clothes disdainfully, and instantly brightened up. "At least you won't be walking around with horrible clothes anymore, Sakura. Being Sasuke's girlfriend requires _much_ more clothes."

She would know. Sasuke and Ino had broken at the end of last year, though they had been together for a full year. However, I didn't enjoy the implication she was making. Was she saying that Sasuke enjoyed fucking his past girlfriends, leaving their clothes disheveled and shredded or something? I certainly hoped not. I bit back a smile—the image was a bit humorous.

A song began to play softly in the background, and Sasuke reached for his phone. He answered it after glancing at the caller identification.

"Hello?" he said.

There was a pause.

"Okay, I'll be right out." His voice had transformed from a polite greeting to an angry snap before he hung up and shoved the phone back into its pocket.

"Itachi again?" guessed Kiba, who was the only one not staring directly at me.

"Yeah." Sasuke took my hand and stood up with me following immediately. Confused, I blinked at the Uchiha while waiting for an explanation. He didn't even meet my gaze. "Later, everybody," he said, and pulled me away from them.

As we walked—or as Sasuke dragged me along—I wondered what Hinata and Naruto were up to. Probably walking home toward Naruto's house since Hinata disliked being with her cousin Neji. I could remember the days when my friends would sleep over at either my house or Hinata's since none of our parents really cared. Those days were already far in the past though. I doubted they would ever return.

Suddenly I remembered Sasuke's decision with Ino. "I don't have much money, Sasuke," I told him apathetically. "I won't be able to buy any clothes."

"You can borrow—"

"I'll _never_ get any money," I corrected before he could continue. "Borrowing will only make it worse."

"You can _have_ some of mine then."

Of course. Uchiha Sasuke was the son of rich and famous parents. Money was probably springing out of his ears literally. Money to him was like trees in a rainforest. More than plenty. I bit back a sigh as we left the building, and he pulled me toward the street in front of us.

"Sasuke!" shouted somebody from behind. So much going on—a headache had already evolved while I was trying to process all of Sasuke's friends and remember them. Nevertheless, I glanced back to see who it was.

"What do you want?" Sasuke demanded from the girl who was approaching steadily.

She wasn't exactly tall, but she wasn't short either. She was probably one of the sophomores, whom I didn't know too well. Her eyes were a hazel type of brown, and her chocolate brown hair had been placed in two buns at the top of her head. Frankly her hair-do looked like a panda to me, but I kept my mouth shut.

If she saw me at Sasuke's side, she didn't make it known. This girl—this sophomore—didn't even glance at me. At least, I wasn't being stared at like a human experiment, the way the rest of Sasuke's friends stared at me recently, but then again I had a feeling she was _not_ one of Sasuke's normal friends.

"Trying to sneak away without me knowing? You promised you'd take me today," she stated, her voice cold and angry. Apparently they were talking about something I had no idea about.

"Take you where?" Sasuke asked. I could hear the lie in his voice though. He knew what this girl was talking about.

"Don't give me that. You said you'd help me perfect my lay-ups at the basketball court today. Remember?"

"Oh." He acted as if he had just barely remembered. "Sorry, Tenten, not today. I'm busy."

"The try-outs for girl's basketball are tomorrow, and you _promised_. I just need a little advice."

"Tough."

Sasuke forced me to turn around, and he began leading me away, half-dragging me again. Suddenly what that girl said stopped him in his tracks. "Fine," was what she began to say. "I'll just tell Itachi that you're a liar, and he'll _sympathetically _help me instead. He's picking you up from school today, isn't he? Perfect. For me, that is."

Uchiha Sasuke turned back, his onyx eyes overwhelmed with outrage. "You wouldn't."

"I _would_." Her voice was different now, almost _smug_. She was smirking as if she were some two-year-old whose tantrum had just succeeded in getting her something sweet. After a pause of silence, she decided to speak again, her voice taunting and still with the hint of smugness. "You promised."

He turned to me. "Will you mind?"

I felt the urge to let my jaw drop to the ground. Uchiha Sasuke had knowingly made me his "slave" in a way, and now he was actually asking for my opinion on things? Obviously this girl and the threat of being tattled on in front of this Itachi person was screwing with his head. But I shrugged to answer his question anyway. "Do I really have a choice?"

"Yes, you have a choice," he answered.

I shook my head to rattle the weird words out, but he knew I wasn't declining what he wanted. "Nah, it's okay. Whatever you want." Why was Sasuke being so nice?

"If you're done talking to that girl, I'm still waiting for an answer, you know," Tenten complained.

Finally Sasuke relented. "You know, sometimes I wish you would just die."

She grinned as if the answer was a yes.

"Come on."

She took her place at Sasuke's other side, and once again, we began walking toward wherever Sasuke was leading us. This time though, I wasn't being dragged. For once, being next to my greatest enemy at Konoha High wasn't too bad. I smiled triumphantly.

"Itachi's better than you at the lay-up," Tenten said and glanced at the Uchiha. "He never misses. Maybe I should _still_ ask him instead since you were a jerk—"

"Now what do you want? Do you have some problem with people who actually are busy once in a while?"

"Nah, I only have a problem with rich jerks who have attitudes. And I just want to get on your nerves."

"I'll tell Itachi you're my girlfriend, so he won't help you with lay-ups—"

"I'll tell everyone you said I was your girlfriend—"

"All right, all right. Just don't ask Itachi, okay?"

She grinned again. "Okay."

I watched the two of them, fascinated with their bickering. Maybe they weren't exactly friends, but they sure knew each other well enough to hit the other's weak points. But this girl seemed to enjoy Sasuke's company—not because he was attractive or because she would be bullied if she chose to dislike him. No, she enjoyed being with him because she understood Sasuke and was willing to become friends with him. I wondered how anyone would want to be Sasuke's friend, excluding all the outrageous girls who wanted much more than friendship.

"Who is she anyway?" asked Tenten when we finally reached the sidewalk. Her eyes had finally begun examining me, and I nervously smiled. It felt strange to suddenly be the center of attention, but walking next to an Uchiha and holding hands with one would probably do that.

"My girlfriend," Sasuke answered emotionlessly. He didn't really seem to care that she was asking personal questions, even though only a minute ago they had been arguing.

"Oh," Tenten said like a child who had just learned what to call a butterfly. "So I guess my blackmail of telling everyone that you're my boyfriend doesn't really work anymore, right?"

Sasuke smirked. "Right." He stopped walking suddenly, and Tenten mimicked him instantly. I wasn't ready for the abrupt halt, and almost bumped into Sasuke. Luckily my reaction time wasn't so bad. I jumped back before I could get too close.

The car Sasuke had stopped by was a black SUV, or at least as far as I knew. I didn't really have a complete knowledge on cars, but I was pretty sure on the SUV in front of me. Tenten hopped in as if it were her own ride, and shaking his head at her, obviously amused, Sasuke got in afterward. I followed him in a moment, and sat next to him when he took the middle seat.

The driver was playing on some system—game-boy or nintendo DS, I wasn't sure. When we got in the car, he didn't put it away. Upon closer inspection, I saw that despite the more lightly colored hair and the wrinkles near his eyes, he looked a lot like Sasuke. Maybe he was that "brother" we were talking about before.

"Hey, Itachi." Tenten leaned forward and stared at the driver through her eyelashes. "Sasuke threatened not to help me with basketball like he promised."

Sasuke rolled his eyes before the one named Itachi could reply. "You're not pretty enough to flirt."

"Itachi?"

The driver put his game away and flipped on the car. "Maybe Sasuke's afraid he _can't_ help you."

"He should be," responded Tenten. "You're better at it than him, after all—"

"Stop talking about Sasuke like he's not here!" The words slipped through my mouth before I could even stop them. Awkwardly I glanced at Sasuke, relieved when his expression was not one of annoyance but one of thanks. Realizing that he probably thought I was just keeping the act of being his girlfriend up, I sighed in relief.

Itachi looked over his shoulder at me as he began to drive forward. I blushed and averted my gaze. He was attractive. Very attractive. But I hated to know he was driving without looking where he was going. Luckily when I chanced another glance at him, his eyes were back on the road. "Who's the girl?" he asked with little interest.

"Sasuke's girlfriend," Tenten answered. "Funny, too, because I've only seen her get beaten up by Sasuke . . . If I remember correctly. She's tough—for a nerd, that is."

"I'm not a nerd." So even somebody who I had never seen in my life knew about me? I guess I _had_ attracted a lot of attention when standing up against Sasuke—and I was probably getting more attention now. I sighed. I wished this wasn't happening. I wished I could just switch to another "bad" school. But then again, I'd probably get into the same fix I was in now.

The car trip passed in silence for a while until Itachi spoke. "The basketball court by our house, right?"

"Right," Sasuke agreed. Faintly surprised, I glanced at him. He hadn't spoken from the moment we had entered the car. I wondered if it had something to do with Itachi . . . It wouldn't be too much of a surprise, after all. Brothers rarely got along. Even though I was an only child, I could see that much from those around me.

The car came to a stop near a few basketball courts, lined up near an elementary school. I got out of the car first, and Sasuke was quick to follow. Tenten gave one last flirting goodbye to Itachi and closed the car door. Now that she was out, however, all signs of flirting vanished. "God, he's so creepy. How do you put up with him?"

"I don't," Sasuke answered. He was holding my free hand, and I could feel it shaking slightly. My eyes examined him thoroughly. His face was blank, but his onyx eyes still held a tint of discontent.

Without realizing what I was doing, I squeezed his hand to comfort him. I never could find out why. It was as if . . . I didn't know. Maybe some urge to comfort someone under stress, some _girl_ instinct to hug someone who was upset. He threw me a look, half of it saying "leave me alone," and the other half grateful. Faking a slight smile, I pretended to only see the grateful part in his expression.

Tenten seemed completely out of the silent conversation going on as she reached into her backpack and retrieved a regular basketball to play with.

Onyx eyes turning curious, Sasuke eyed the ball in her hands. "You really weren't going to take a no for an answer, were you?"

She grinned. "Of course not. Come help me now." The girl started walking off leaving her backpack in the middle of the sidewalk as if she had forgotten it. She went toward the first hoop she could find and started shooting to warm up.

I heard Sasuke let out a sigh of frustration as he released my hand and picked up Tenten's backpack. "I promise this won't take long," he told me, and I followed him to the same hoop. Sitting down on the grass where Sasuke had left Tenten's backpack, I took out my homework while thinking this was probably going to be my only chance to sneak it in.

Checking over my answers at least three times each, I did my math homework first. It didn't take too long. Hatake Kakashi was a very good teacher, and I had learned very quickly when I was lucky enough to get into his class. I still felt a little guilty over that one question today that I had not been able to answer. _It's just one question_, I reminded myself. _And I was just getting absorbed into the note Sasuke was passing me. I can pay attention to both at once._

I breathed in a big gulp of air, and moved on to my other homework. Sasuke had finished giving Tenten advice on her lay-ups and now they were engaged in a one-on-one basketball game. I paused from writing the paragraph assigned in English, and watched them play. From all my years of knowing him, Sasuke had never been happy. Certainly, he was triumphant and childish when picking on people—including myself—but never had he really seemed . . . well, happy. But now, as I watched him run up and down the court, trying to score points, I could tell that he was no longer the obnoxious guy I had become enemies with. He _was_ happy. Maybe this was the Sasuke that I had used to have a crush on, that Ino had a crush on. Maybe this was the Sasuke, who was Tenten's friend. Maybe this was the Sasuke who was trying to become my friend, instead of controlling me.

And though I hated to admit it, this _happy_ Sasuke could be the one I opened up to—not to the rude and hateful Sasuke, but the one playing basketball right now. I shook my head and returned to my homework.

* * *

**A/N**: Hey, I didn't like this chapter much. Just basically introducing more characters... Well, I'm not sure I'm 100 percent happy with ANY of the chapters, lol, but we'll see how it goes. Thanks for those fifteen reviews. WOW! That made me so excited. ^^ Thanks so much, everyone!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I'm not dead, I'm alive, lol! Sorry!! I was busy.... Uh, enough said. And please do try to remember that most of these Naruto chapters that I'm posting on my account are things I wrote a long time ago that no doubt need to be revised. Sorry, and I'll try to edit everything in a while--which could be anytime from a month to a year. That's also why it's hard to update; it's hard to edit things that are so stupid that I know I wrote, lol.... I'm writing newer things at the moment that will hopefully be out soon. Thanks for reviews, and enjoy! :)

* * *

Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl

_Chapter Three_

* * *

"So what do you think?"

I shrugged to ease off the wonder threatening to burst inside of me.

"That's not an answer. What do you think?"

"Um . . . huge?" I tried. It wasn't every day I saw a mansion as big as this. The stairwell in the middle of the room spiraled up, floors and floors and floors. An elevator was behind it, and I realized there was probably about four or five floors to this mansion. All around me were clear-glassed windows stretching from the ceiling to the ground. I gazed in wonder at the paintings hung on the wall. And this was only the opening room—the room connected to the front door.

Sasuke chuckled slightly, though the laughter was without mirth. "I thought so."

I took off my backpack and glanced at him to see where to put it. He held out a hand, and I gave it to him quickly. His footsteps echoed throughout the entire room as he opened a closet and set it inside. He put his own backpack there as well.

"So," I started when he returned and led me to the elevator. "If I'm right in assuming Itachi is your brother, then what is he doing here? I thought he was going to Princeton."

The elevator door opened, and he entered it swiftly, pushing a button for the third floor. "It's a holiday for him. My mother thinks it's best to have him pick me up from school on his holidays. 'Brotherly time' is what she calls it. Usually I just drive or take the bus."

"Oh." Shutting behind me as I entered, the elevator began to rise until it reached the third floor. We walked out, and he led me down the long hallway toward his room. Another question had been bugging me for some time too, so I decided now was as good a time as any to ask. "Why did you let Tenten walk home alone?"

"She wanted to."

I followed him as he entered his room and sat down on his bed. "Why did you _let_ Tenten walk home alone?" If _I_ ever walked home alone . . . Well, Kiba, Neji, or even Sasuke could regularly find me.

"She's not a wimp, you know," Sasuke finally answered. "She'd stand a good chance against me even."

I frowned. "Huh?"

Knowing that I had heard, he didn't answer.

Still frowning, I sat down on the floor. It was common courtesy to walk a girl home. But then again, I guessed that Sasuke, being one of the naughty kids attending Konoha High, probably wasn't familiar with common courtesy. It was funny how one of the rich kids could know less about manners than someone like me, tempered and poor all the way through. "So am I _allowed_ to talk to Tenten?" I asked curiously. I really needed a friend, and Tenten seemed the least "girlish" out of all my opportunities.

"I haven't decided. Probably not."

I wanted to land a good kick on his face, to maybe wipe that smirk off his expression. I took back all previous thoughts. Being friends with that _happy_ Sasuke was not worth knowing the rude and egotistical one. I turned my back on him and sat down on the floor, not planning on saying anything unless he _ordered _me to.

But soon boredom started to pester me as silence forced me to stare at the wall and do nothing. "Do you have a paper and a pencil?" Maybe I could draw something to pass the time.

"Yes." I didn't hear him make a single hint of moving to get the requested objects.

"Can _I_ have a paper and a pencil?"

"Yeah." Still, nothing.

"_May_ I have a damn paper and pencil?"

"No."

I stood up and turned to face him while placing my hands on my hips and gathering the most annoyed expression I could muster. "What the hell do you want from me?"

An annoyed expression on his face, Uchiha Sasuke still sat in the same place on his bed while he stared at me with icy, black eyes. He didn't answer my question, nor did he open his mouth. He stayed completely still. I wondered if his plan was to make me destroy the deal I had made, just so that he would have an excuse to bug me more. I was already tired and sick of his game. I was already dangling close to the edge. One more push and I would fall. But was that really what he wanted?

"Sasuke. What do you want?" False politeness masked my angry tone, and I stopped frowning—I simple _looked_ at him while I awaited an answer.

He removed his eyes from me and stared at the floor below him. "I want you to act like a friend would."

"That sounds really needy," I commented, amused. "Besides, I already told you. It won't work."

He leapt to his feet as he put his arms around my neck. My head hit the wall hard, and I struggled to escape. If it wasn't for my sprained arm, I could have pulled him off, but he had me too tightly. "Then _make_ it work," he said coldly.

I tried to breathe, but there was so little air. How did I act when Hinata and Naruto were around? How did I feel? Did I smile? Did I frown? Did I act neutrally, or did I laugh? I couldn't remember. It was a mixture of all of those feelings, all of those actions. The response to friendship just came naturally. I never _thought_ about what I would say; I just _said_ it. They were friends. They wouldn't care if I made a mistake.

But Sasuke—no, Sasuke could never become my friend, no matter how hard I tried. He _did_ care if I made a mistake. And that was why it wouldn't work. "Sasuke," I wheezed, and tried with my unhurt hand to pull him off me. He let go after a moment when my vision started to grow blurry.

"Make it work."

"It's not possible." I took in a deep breath to refill my lungs. "You can't expect me to know what to do. Manipulating me, yes, it's possible. But forcing me to have friendship . . . It's something you just can't buy."

He turned his back on me as if to think about it. I knew he believed he could buy everything—and not necessarily with money. He bought my obedience with threats. He chose to buy me popularity by giving me money. But there were some things he could not buy, and he needed to understand that.

"Sasuke, dinner's ready!" called a high-pitched female voice.

He didn't move. He hardly even seemed to breathe.

"Sasuke!" The words the woman shouted blended into background static when Sasuke turned around.

"Make it work." Then he left the room and shut the door behind him.

* * *

It had been an hour, and I was starving. I wanted to eat. The odor of fresh food filled the air and caused my stomach to do tiny flips inside my body. The door remained shut, and when I had tried to get through it, I had found Sasuke had locked it. And so I had sat down on his bed and curled up into a ball while trying to ignore the breathtaking growls my stomach was making. Nausea came with hunger, and I wondered when I would be able to throw up on his desk or bed or something. I hadn't even eaten lunch.

Seeing a picture frame on the very desk I wanted to vomit on, I gathered the energy to sit up and look at it. What caught my eye most was how it was turned facedown on the table. Most people who didn't want to see a picture anymore just tossed it in a trash can. So why was this picture frame put out of sight, yet not thrown away either?

I gently grabbed the picture frame to look at it, and gasped at what I saw. A young Sasuke on one side with a huge grin on his face. He was happy. A younger Itachi stood next to him with a hand on Sasuke's shoulder. He was also grinning. What I assumed to be Sasuke's mother was in the picture next to Uchiha Fugaku. Mikoto was smiling, and Fugaku looked a tiny bit happy.

"What are you doing?"

I jumped and almost forgot the picture was in my hands. Luckily I grasped it before it could fall. There, Sasuke stood, staring at the frame in my hands. He quickly walked over and yanked it from me, setting it back in its facedown position. "I asked you a question, Sakura."

I avoided his gaze. "N-nothing. Sorry."

He sat down in his desk chair, and I noticed that he had he had brought his backpack. He pulled out a textbook and a paper before starting to do his homework. I sat down on his bed and watched for a few minutes. My stomach still growled periodically, but if Sasuke noticed, he didn't say anything. Several minutes passed. I saw that his hand had dropped the pencil. Then I realized his eyes were closed and his head was leaned forward as if it was too heavy to hold up.

He had fallen asleep.

"Sasuke?" I whispered, just in case.

There was no answer. Carefully I searched in his pockets for the keys to his room. He snored when I found them, and I closed my eyes, afraid for my wellbeing if he woke up. He didn't though, and I thanked my luck. Tiptoeing toward the door, I unlocked it and retreated to the elevator. I was hungry enough to eat my own fingers, and from what I had heard, the famous Uchiha Mikoto would probably be nice enough to give me leftovers or something.

I went to the first floor, and began wandering around the hallways, trying to find the kitchen. If anything, I'd just cook something for myself, and if anyone caught me, I could just say I was Sasuke's girlfriend. They'd probably believe me . . . I reached the kitchen to find Itachi, Sasuke's brother, hovering over the stove. He looked up when I walked in.

"Yo."

Not knowing what to do, I smiled.

"Sasuke's starving you?"

I shrugged and leaned on the counter behind me. Sasuke would get angry if I told anyone about our "deal."

"So you're his next victim, aren't you? Last year it was Ino, but I guessed he got bored with her. She was _willing_ to be with him, and he didn't like that."

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I'm not stupid," Itachi said clearly. He smiled slightly as he said so. "You're not here because you want to be. He knew what you wanted, and made a deal with you probably. He's always been that way. Playing God. It's the effect of how his father treats him. He likes to pretend he has control of everything."

I sighed, once I realized that Itachi knew everything about what Sasuke was doing to me, how he had forced me into submission. At least, I had someone to talk to about it, if only for the moment. "He wants me to be his friend," I admitted. "But I hate him. He used to be my worst enemy—he still is really. He used to tease me, and I'd try to fight him. I always ended up getting beaten up in the end. And now he's just bullying me in a different way. A _worse_ way." I hardly noticed the tears coming to my eyes. "I guess starvation was my punishment for not knowing how to pretend to be his friend."

Itachi tossed me an apple. "Eat up then."

Smiling, I caught the apple and took a huge bite out of it. My stomach already had seemed to calm down the minute I had seen food in front of me.

"Where is Sasuke anyway?"

I shrugged and took another bite. "Sleeping over his homework."

"Would you like something to drink?"

"Sure."

He reached into the cupboard and pulled out a small glass. Then Itachi poured a strange liquid into it. I didn't really care. The site of something to drink was enticing. My throat was parched and dry. I took it and rose the drink to my lips.

A sharp pain hit my hand, and I dropped the glass. Glass shattered on the floor around my feet, and I felt shards scrape my legs. I yelped. But none of that registered as much as the culprit who had apparently kicked me in the hand. Sasuke stood in front of me, right between me and Itachi.

His back pressing me against the counter, Sasuke's body felt tense and almost trembling. "What the hell are you doing to her?" I winced at the volume of his voice.

"She's thirsty."

"Don't _ever_ even _speak _to her again! Got it?"

The shock protecting my brain wore off and searing pain ripped all throughout my legs. I struggled to stay calm. The pain was just a few cuts and scrapes from the glass, nothing else. But after a moment, I could hardly even stay standing. When I glanced at my legs, I saw blood all over.

I heard Itachi's voice through the thick veil of my pain, but his words were just a blur of noise. Suddenly Sasuke picked me up, and carried me away. I clung to his shoulders, afraid of falling, and it felt strange to feel protected by the most hated person on my list of enemies. But still—there was comfort in the way he clutched me to his body and held me in his arms. So warm.

So _safe_.

I cringed at the thought.

He set me down. I couldn't tell where since my eyes were shut too tightly. Then I heard the steady sound of water falling and felt hands take off my socks. "Sasuke?" I whispered, unsure of what he was doing.

He didn't respond—maybe because he couldn't hear me. The running water I heard was very loud, and there was also the fact that I was whispering. He lifted my legs, and I winced when I felt warm water seeping through my toes. The water also touched my legs, and somehow the pain began to vanish.

"Ow!" I cried when it felt like a needle penetrated my skin.

A hand touched my own and squeezed it.

Another prick of pain. I drew in a ragged breath. Would it be worth it to open my eyes? I figured I might as well try. I struggled not to gasp when I saw Uchiha Sasuke himself trying to get the shards of glass out of my legs. The water I had heard was from a bathtub, and I was sitting on the edge of it. A washcloth dangled from Sasuke's hand as he tried to use water in order for the glass to peak out of my skin.

I gasped again when he got another one out. "No, stop. _Stop_!" He pulled out another one as I tried to move away. "I can do that later," I told him anxiously. I would feel a lot more comfortable if my mother would do it when she got home. He made no move to stop, and it was hard to admit that I didn't want to resist. With each fragment he pulled out, my legs felt even less painful.

After a few minutes he finished, and pulled out a first-aid kit. He used band-aides to cover my still bleeding cuts. "Why did you do that?" I asked, referring to how he had kicked the glass from my hand. My knuckles still ached from the impact.

"Don't talk to Itachi." Sasuke finished and stood up, avoiding my unrelenting gaze. "He's only trouble."

"What do you mean?" I moved my legs from the bathtub water after accepting the towel Sasuke was offering me.

"Don't you know what you were about to drink?"

I shook my head angrily. His voice sounded so accusing, as if I was some child who didn't understand how metal objects weren't supposed to be poked into plugs. I wasn't a baby. I knew what I was doing.

"Alcohol."

Suddenly the task of putting on my socks grew very interesting. "Oh."

"Why do you think he's not going to Princeton with a scholarship? He used to skip high school classes half the time to do drugs, and it took _so _much money to convince Princeton to take him. He's a major addict. Did it ever cross your mind that I was wary of him for a reason?"

"_You_ aren't a druggie?"

He didn't answer that for a moment. I fixed an accusing glare at him. "Not anymore," he admitted.

I suddenly wanted to go back on the deal that had lasted only a day. I wanted to stay away from Sasuke's family as much as possible. The lot of them seemed to be only trouble. I looked at the bathroom door longingly.

"Hey, we've all tried some type of smoking in the past, haven't we? What matters is that we stopped."

"I've never smoked or drank alcohol." My parents had annoyed me a lot about the risks of such things. And the peer pressure especially. They had stressed their point until they had gotten it through. And even though there had been a lot of times I could have slipped some into my system, I had always lived through the temptation.

Sasuke moved in front of my face to block my view of the door. "Then you're lucky. Everybody, probably including that rich Hinata friend of yours, has done something bad like that. Did you know Naruto used to be high most of the time, too?"

He was labeling my friends now. I wouldn't take it. I turned to face the other way.

"So you're going back on the deal, just because I _used_ to smoke?"

"I want to go home."

"What?"

I drew in a deep breath and stared at him desperately. "I want to go home."

He closed his eyes for a moment before turning away and leaving. I followed him as he entered the elevator, and I followed him as he stepped out. He walked all the way to a black corvette and opened the passenger seat's door for me. I ignored the good deed and got into the back seat.

The car drive passed in silence fortunately. I didn't ask aloud how Sasuke knew the directions to my house, but I did wonder. Maybe he had planned this out for a long time. I pitied him for messing up so soon. I even felt a singe of regret for going back on the deal which had taken him forever to perfect. But the minute I was within walking distance of my house, I told him to stop, and I hopped out of the car to go home.

* * *

Yeah, I wasn't satisfied with this chapter at all... But I can't figure out how to make it better. Helpful advice would be... well, helpful, lol. Thanks. :-)


	4. Chapter 4

"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?  
Holding too tightly,  
Afraid to loose control._  
'_Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you.  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,  
And every second I waste is more than I can take.  
I've become so numb,  
I can't feel you there."_

—Linkin Park

**Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl**

_Chapter Four_

This was the moment. This would be the hardest few minutes of my life. But I would bear it. If they didn't forgive me, I would understand. But they needed to at least know why I had done what I had done.

As I approached them cautiously, Naruto stole a few warning glares in my direction, and Hinata avoided my gaze. They were sitting under a tree outside, our usual spot to eat at lunch, and I sat down at my usual place beside them.

"What the hell are you doing here, Sakura?"

It hurt to hear his voice dropping the suffix for my name. But I deserved everything they threw at me. "Yesterday was not what you think."

"Then what the fuck was it?"

Hinata finally glanced at me, and Naruto pierced me with his knowing, blue eyes. I struggled to withhold a wince. "I _still_ hate Sasuke. I would still kick him in the nuts if I got a chance."

"Sakura-san, why? Wh-why did you sit with him in math?" Hinata's voice was so gentle, yet so upset inside. I could hear the slight tremors of nervousness in her voice, warning me she was about to cry.

"He offered me a deal, and I took it." I bit my lip as Naruto, in a rage, stood up and stared down at me angrily.

"Sakura, we're not buying it! Why don't you go sit with him and his minions? Why don't you just _become_ one of them!"

I didn't move. I promised myself to leave, just as soon as I finished telling them. They needed to know, to understand. "He said if I did whatever he told me for the rest of high school, he would stop picking on us—including you two. You're my friends, even if I'm not yours. I wanted to protect you. Sasuke told me not to tell you the truth."

Naruto's outraged façade fell, and Hinata wiped away her tears.

I stood up and began to leave. They didn't want me. I didn't blame them. I'd betrayed them . . . I felt a hand touch my shoulder, and surprised, I looked back. It was Naruto. Hinata stood right behind him. "What?" I asked.

"We . . ." Hinata trailed off her unfinished statement.

"We never expected that of you, Sakura-chan," Naruto said for her. "You shouldn't have to live through Hell, just so we can be happy."

I looked away from him. "That's what friends do."

"No, friends live through Hell _together_, and they still _are_ happy." Naruto forced me into a deep hug, and soon Hinata joined the embrace.

Even though Sasuke would probably enforce his half of the deal by bothering us more, Naruto was right. We were friends, no matter how time changed us. I could feel all of us, together—happy. I could feel warmth, and finally I remembered what friendship could be. It was elation, joy, love. All warm.

"Stop it!" screamed an aggravated voice in the background.

I felt chills rush down my spine when I recognized the voice. Hinata and Naruto also seemed to feel warning shivers. I broke away from them and headed toward the noise.

"_Green_ hair? You trying to challenge forehead-girl? So lame . . ." Ino.

I heard a noise that was definitely a punch, and then a yelp of pain.

"You're such an idiot," said another voice. "Wouldn't it be obvious if we hated Sakura, then we'd hate you?"

I reached a crowd of people and tried to push through. Naruto caught up with me and helped me get forward. As we pushed and shoved, more voices caught my attention.

"Besides, if you wanted a bright color like Sakura's pink hair, then why'd you make it that yucky green? It looks like a fat person's shit."

The same girl made a groan as if she was trying to escape. "It wasn't my fau—ow! Stop it!"

Finally I burst through the crowd, only to see exactly who I had imagined getting beat up. Tenten. Her hair was no longer in its two buns but long and down to her mid-waist. The color of it was definitely the way Ino and the others were describing it—a dark and sick shade of green. A few bruises littered her face, and Neji was holding her arms behind her back as Kiba stood in front of her face. Ino watched from afar, throwing taunts and insults at a safe distance. Sasuke stood next to her, though he did not appear to be enjoying the show.

Before Naruto could stop me, I raced up and stood in Kiba's way. "She said stop." When he didn't respond, I fixed him with my most angry glare. "Stop!"

"Loser. Defending your own copycat, huh?" Kiba laughed dangerously.

But then Naruto rushed to my side, also blocking Tenten from Sasuke's friend. Apparently Kiba and Neji didn't like the odds for they glanced at Sasuke, saw he wasn't in any mood to fight, and backed away. I turned to Tenten, who had fallen to her knees, breathing heavily. The crowd began to dissemble. Neji, Kiba, and Ino were gone. And so was Sasuke. Then the four of us—Naruto, Hinata, Tenten, and I—were alone.

I saw a small hat thrown disdainfully at her side. I knew it was Tenten's. Reaching over and taking it, I handed it to her.

"What's that for?" she demanded crossly. "They already know."

Naruto helped her up. "For luck."

She took it and placed it on her head.

"Stop hanging out with Sasuke." I adjusted her greenish-brown bangs back into place. "It'll always lead to this."

Jerking her head away from me, Tenten took a step back. "Think what you want about Sasuke. Just stay _away_ from me." She began to walk away, but her legs just didn't seem to have the strength. Her body fell to the ground with a sickening thud.

Raindrops plummeted onto my face. An instant storm. Those didn't happen often. While inhaling in the warm smell of raindrops, I tried to help Tenten up. She pushed me away firmly. "Leave me alone!" I didn't want to listen to her. I wanted to help. Naruto had to drag me away before I abandoned the hope of bringing her to the nurse's office.

From under the tree, we began to eat lunch with Hinata. I could still see Tenten laying on the muddy blacktop, facedown and unmoving. Raindrops fell like needles from the sky on top of her. Why did she want to be left alone?

Hinata noticed me staring at her. "She . . . She doesn't want to be embarrassed. She feels weak, and . . . she hates it."

I frowned. "But it's not fair."

Naruto put a hand on my shoulder. "It's the truth."

OOO

"Sasuke, what the hell were you doing back there?" He was heading toward the bus and about to board. I had questions though, and he wasn't leaving until he gave me my answers.

"Back where?" he lied. Then he sighed and glanced at the bus again. "Sakura, my only ride home will leave any minute now."

"Too bad, so sad. You have some explaining to do." Why he didn't just get on the bus and leave was beyond me, but I would take any opportunity flashed my way. "Why didn't you stop them from hurting Tenten?"

"You think I cared?" Sasuke snorted and began to walk off.

"She's your _friend_."

He stopped.

"The way you just stared at what was happening to her—God! It makes me _sick_!" I drove down the tears threatening to surface. Why did this upset me? Things like this happened all the time. Why did this particular instance hurt?

Sasuke faced me, his expression cold and dark. "Do you think I _could _have stopped them?" He shook his head in answer to his own question. "This is a cruel world. It's either bully or be bullied—or watch from afar. In this world somebody will always get hurt. I just chose to watch is all."

"When Naruto and I interfered, no one got hurt," I countered. "You can't base your future on your past. Things change. _You_ can change."

"Why the hell do you even give a damn—"

A voice rang clearly from behind us; "Sasuke!"

I glanced over my shoulder to see Tenten, limping toward us, almost half-crying and half-trying to be brave. The hat hiding her hair must have been discarded, and I wondered who had died her hair the sickly shade in the first place.

The Uchiha waited for her to reach him before allowing her to sink in his arms. That was when she started sobbing hysterically. "They sprained my ankle. I can't run. I can hardly even walk." She choked out the words, instead of taking the chance to breathe. "I can't . . . make the basketball team now. The coach won't even let me _try_, ever since . . . she saw my ankle. Can I . . . Can I come home with you?"

I scowled as her speech rang clearly in my ears. All this time, I had been arguing on _her_ behalf. "Tenten, why don't you hate him? He didn't lift a finger to help you!"

She didn't answer. She completely ignored me.

Sasuke answered for the weeping Sophomore in his arms. "She knows how cruel this world can be."

With Tenten still leaning on him heavily, Sasuke got on the school bus. Only seconds later, it zoomed past, leaving a nice trail of dust as a memoir. I finally realized how much about Konoha High, my own school, that I had never understood.

OOO

The rain pelted against the glass as I stared out the window. Thunder and lightning attacked the silence every few seconds. Hinata jumped each time. I sighed and took her hand in my grasp. Some childish traits just never went away. Naruto's eyes faced the floor, gloominess written all over him.

It wasn't as if we played outside. We usually just talked for a while indoors. But for some reason, the rain had forced silence upon us.

I knew I was only unnaturally quiet because the speech Sasuke had given me rang clearly in my head—Naruto had been friends with drug addicts, he had _been_ one? Sensing the heavy weight in the air, Naruto had remained quiet, as well; neither of us really knew what to say. And Hinata was always quiet.

Finally I couldn't hold the temptation to speak down any longer. "Sasuke told me things." Vague, but still I had managed to say _something_.

"Wh-what sort of things?" Hinata asked.

"About you two."

Naruto shifted uncomfortably on the sofa.

"He said everyone's done drugs, and that you two weren't spared," I explain while trying to keep my wavering voice calm. "Of course, I don't believe him . . . But I do think we should all be honest with each other. So . . . I've never done drugs or drank. Hinata?"

She shrugged. "I didn't do drugs, but, well . . . O-one night, Neji brought all his friends over for a party, and I was just l-lonely. No one would talk to me. So I drank one glass. I haven't since then."

My head dipped into a firm nod, believing yet not critical, and then I turned to Naruto. "You?"

"Yeah . . . Lots actually." He kept his gaze locked on the floor and avoided both of ours. "My parents died. Everyone kept saying that smoking and drinking stuff would make everything better, so I tried. It worked at first, and everybody suddenly became friends with me—something that had never happened before."

So Sasuke had been right. "What made you change?"

"Well, it was you, Sakura-chan. You were always happy, but you didn't drink." He grinned widely, and I smiled back.

Silence overwhelmed everyone again, but this time, there was no unspoken question, no lasting regret. Comfortable. Warm. But all good things weren't meant to last. Suddenly the air felt different and full of ominous foreboding. I wanted to shrink back into the armchair, never to return. I felt lost . . . helplessly lost. And I wondered if it was some sixth sense people had when something bad was about to happen. Almost as if someone was about to die.

No.

Almost as if . . .

Someone _wanted _to die.

No, who did I know that wanted to die? I pushed the thoughts away.

The phone rang, but no one made a move to get it. Three rings passed before I finally stood up and checked the caller ID. An unknown name. I sighed again and picked it up. "Hello?"

"You were right. About today."

I drowsily rubbed my eyes. "Who is this?"

"It's me."

Him! "How did you get my phone number?" I glanced from Naruto to Hinata, who were both staring at me with interest. Did one of them give away my home phone number, and then had it somehow gotten to Sasuke? He hadn't answered my question, so I figured I would never find out. "Never mind. Why are you calling me?"

"To apologize."

"You? Apologize?" I shook my head and began to pace. "What do you want?"

"To apologize," he repeated.

"No." I laughed for a minute before getting serious. "Really, what do you want?"

"To fucking apologize!"

I bit my lip. "Oh."

"Listen, she _should _be pissed at me. I don't know why she isn't. Maybe she's just confused—"

I didn't know what the hell he was talking about. "Slow down please. Who should be pissed at you?"

"Do you have short-term memory or something? Tenten!" He sounded so upset on the other line. He sounded ready to explode. "For years she hasn't made the basketball team. Middle school, elementary . . Her lay-ups have always been crappy, and everyone at her school that tried out has always been one of those athletic boys. She worked _forever _to fix them this year. I promised to help her make sure she didn't fail. I _promised_!"

I wanted to put my hands over my ears to drown out the noise. He was seriously getting worked up. It was getting me agitated. "Why did you call _me_? I'm sure Ino or someone else would be better—"

"_You're_ the only damn person who understands at that retarded school!" he yelled. "I _promised_ to help her make it! I even offered to bribe the coach, and now . . . Now look at what the hell happened! Do you realize what I did? I just watched as she got beat up, and . . . I . . . God, you were fucking _right_!"

"Okay, okay," I whispered. "Just calm down, okay?"

He took a deep breath, but I could still feel the tension. He was losing it.

"Listen, I'm going to come down there. Don't move until I get there, got it?"

He took another deep breath. "Yeah."

I sat down on the sofa and crossed my legs. "You promise?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, hold on. Don't hang up." I set the phone down at my side, and turned to Hinata. "Can I have something to write on? Fast please?"

She nodded and got into her backpack. Hinata was the neatest out of all of us, so I knew she'd find a pencil and paper the quickest. Naruto was hovering over me anyway, away from any source of writing. "What's going on? Who's on the phone?" he asked.

I shook my head, and took the notepad and pen that Hinata was offering. Then I picked the phone back up. "You still there?"

"Yeah."

"What's your address?"

There was a long silence before he answered. I scribbled down exactly what he said. "I'll be there in a few minutes. Don't move."

"Okay."

I pressed the off button of the phone and took the notepad with me when I stood. Naruto was right behind me. "Who was that?"

"Uh, Ino," I lied. If I told them it was Sasuke, they wouldn't help, and I knew it. "You have your license, right?"

"No, I lost it."

"I-I do," Hinata answered. "But . . . I'm not supposed to drive with my friends in the car until next month."

I glanced at her desperately. "This is important. I think Sas—Ino wants to . . . Well, she's really upset."

That was all Hinata needed to know. She trusted me. "Okay."

OOO

"Want us to come with you?" Naruto's hand was over my trembling one. "We'll help."

I shook my head and faked a smile. "I'll be fine, thanks." I gathered my things and stepped out of the car. Then I headed toward the huge mansion in front of me. The rain was still heavy, so I put my hood on to keep my hair dry. Only when I rang the doorbell did Hinata drive off with Naruto still staring anxiously in my direction.

I stood with one hand in my pocket, and one hand holding my bag. My legs shivered under the short skirt I was wearing. The door was answered a few moments later to reveal a very beautiful, raven-haired woman who was smiling at me. "Hello, this is the Uchiha residence," she greeted politely.

I smiled back at her. "I'm Sakura, one of Sasuke's friends."

Acknowledgement lit her eyes. "Come in." I entered the house and gratefully gave her my coat to hang in the closet. Staring at the woman as she led me to the elevator, I wondered how a parent like her could send her own son to a school like Konoha High.

"You have a nice house," I complimented instead.

She smiled again. "Thank you. Sasuke's room is the third door on the left."

I nodded, and the elevator door shut. When I reached the third floor, I followed her directions to the Uchiha's room. Hearing voices from inside, I paused for a moment to listen.

"It's not your fault," said a female voice. "You'd only have gotten in big trouble. You know I don't want that."

"I promised you."

"And you _did_ help me with my lay-ups in the end. It's okay. I'll talk to the coach tomorr—"

"No, _I'll_ talk to Anko tomorrow. She'll listen to me."

When I felt awkward listening in on the conversation, I knocked on the door. The steady rhythm of footsteps pounded against the floor, and the door swung open. I looked Sasuke up and down, hardly liking what I saw. A frown seemed to permanently taint his face, the skin on his face was tight and stressed, and his hands were shaking. But that was not what was worrying me.

It was his eyes. His usually cold and aloof eyes were suddenly desperate and begging. All rays of hope had vanished from them. He appeared ready to leap off a cliff at any moment—maybe not completely figuratively. I knew it was not just what had happened today. It was his whole life. He had always bullied people, always ruined their dreams. Maybe me being here wasn't the best idea. I had been one of Sasuke's _victims_, after all.

Entering his room without an invitation, I saw Tenten lying on Sasuke's bed under warm blankets. She appeared sick, and I wondered if she had caught a cold. I sat down on the corner of the bed. "How are you feeling?"

Her brown eyes inspected me for a moment before she answered. "Fine."

My eyes returned to Sasuke, who had shut the door and sat down on a chair. "How are _you_ doing?"

He didn't answer. It seemed as if he didn't know how to respond.

"It's eight o' clock," I said after glancing at my watch. "Have you eaten anything?"

Sasuke's head sank into his hands. "No."

I tried to look under his arms to see his expression. "You should eat something."

He shook his head.

"Come on, show me where the kitchen is," I told him, pretending he hadn't declined the offer.

Sasuke didn't move. I placed my hands on his shoulders and forced him to stand up. It wasn't hard. He didn't even fight back. Literally half-dragging him to the bedroom door, I promised Tenten that we'd be back in a minute and then left. As I forced Sasuke to walk down the stairs, he soon seemed to realize exactly what was happening so that I didn't have to drag him anymore.

We entered the kitchen. I found where Itachi had gotten the apple from the other day to give me, and tossed Sasuke one from the basket. He caught it and stared, but he never ate it. I pretended as though he had started to eat. "You like ramen?" I asked while looking through the cupboards. He didn't answer. Again, I pretended he said yes and started boiling some water.

He was crashing. How long would it be before he wanted to _die_? Even though it was against all good judgement, I started looking through drawers and cabinets while the water heated up, trying to find what he probably wanted most. It would help for the time being anyway. _They have to be somewhere around here_, I thought to myself. Finally I found what I was searching for. The package felt awkward in my hands, but nevertheless, I handed it to him.

Sasuke didn't seem to notice, so I snapped my fingers in front of his face. "You want to smoke?" I asked, holding out the cigarettes and the matchbox.

He shook his head. "I quit."

"Yeah, so?" I took out a match and lighted one. This was crazy, but I didn't see any other way to convince him. Carefully taking the smoking cigarette, I put it in between my lips. "It helps, doesn't it?" I said between puffs.

He shrugged but took one anyway and lighted it.

The smoke burned my throat as I inhaled it and coughed. I really wanted to puke . . . But then again, it wasn't as bad as my parents had made it sound. The minute Sasuke became dazed again I put out my cigarette and threw it in the trash. Long-term side effects were what was really the problem. I knew that better than most teenagers my age. My mother had been a heavy addict a while ago, after all—which was why I had retained my purity for so long.

The water began to boil, so I took it out. I opened the ramen package and dumped the water in. Three more minutes to go.

Sasuke suddenly walked toward the trash can and chucked his cigarette inside.

"What are you doing?" Not that I really knew how long cigarettes lasted, but I had seen people smoke longer than that.

He returned to his position of leaning on the counter. "I quit."

"Oh." He was making so much of an effort. I remembered the look in his eye the first time I had found out he used to be a drug addict. If I were he, I would take the chance to smoke again and rid myself of depression. And knowing Sasuke, he probably would probably want to more than I could ever know. But he had tossed the cigarette into the trash without a second thought. "Why not now?"

"You don't like people who smoke."

_Me_?

I resisted the urge to smile.

The three minutes were up. I handed him a fork and the ramen after he set the apple in his hand down beside him. Then I used the leftover water to make myself some. Another three minutes passed, and we ate in silence, neither of us moving to the dining room, neither of us speaking. At least with each bit of ramen he ate, he appeared less upset and less lost.

My cell phone rang when we were almost finished, and I answered after glancing at the caller ID. "Hey, Naruto," I greeted.

"Hey, you want us to pick you up? It's been two hours."

I glanced at the clock. It was ten. "Uh, sure, thanks."

"Okay, we'll be there in a few minutes. Bye." He hung up before I had a chance to say goodbye too. I knew by the time we were finished that Hinata and Naruto would arrive.

Finished eating, Sasuke's eyes had been on me the entire time I had spoken on the phone. "You don't like people who used to smoke. Why do you hang out with Naruto? He used to be friends with me, you know. He used to do drugs."

I took the last bite of my ramen. "He's a good person. I'd trust him with my life."

He didn't respond. I really didn't think he knew how. Finally he mumbled something about Tenten and began to head toward the stairs. I stopped him when he reached the front door. "My friends will be here any minute now. I should go wait for them. Say bye to Tenten for me."

Sasuke nodded and approached the stairs. He looked so much better over the time I had spent with him. He looked as if he could breathe again. I watched him climb the stairs and reach the second floor.

"Sasuke!" I called.

He looked down at me.

"You're a good person, too. You proved that tonight."

His shoulders relaxed, and his head dipped in a nod slightly—an acknowledgement to what I had said. I smiled back at him as we parted ways.

**

* * *

A/N**: WOW, this chapter was sloppy, choppy, and... sorry, can't think of another oppy word. Maybe dopy.... Mm, Idk... :P Anyway, yeah, I hope you enjoyed. My next update might take a while, since I lost the written version of a small part of it, and I never typed it up. But... my updates have been a little few and far between anyway, so... Sorry! :D :D Anyway, please do tell me how to improve the whole drugs thing. :) I did some research, but... Seriously people, I just don't smoke. Or drink. LOl. So any advice on how to change the awkwardness of drugs in this story would be you-have-no-idea-how-much helpful. (Even if it's not your own personal experience, but just something you heard. Thank you!) Well, cya next chapter. Thanks for all those reviews last chapter, and sorry if I missed replying to a few (MAN, there were millions, thanks.) :D Cya!


	5. Chapter 5

1

"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?  
__Holding too tightly,  
Afraid to loose control.  
_'_Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you.  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,  
And every second I waste is more than I can take.  
I've become so numb,  
I can't feel you there."_

—Lincoln Park

**Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl**

_Chapter Five_

"You totally ditched me, forehead-girl," Ino accused the minute I entered my math classroom. It was a Friday. I liked Fridays—but this Friday seemed a little awkward. The rumor of how I had become Sasuke's girlfriend had finally spread to everyone, but now it was no longer true.

And Ino was mad for goodness knows what. "Ditched you when?"

"I had everything ready! Everything!" she exclaimed. "I figured out which color looked best on you, which eye shadow you should wear, good shoes, and I even estimated how much it would all cost! Then Sasuke comes up and says you won't be coming. Why are you such a ditz?"

I ran a hand through pink hair. "What are you talking about?"

Ino rolled her eyes. "Jee, clueless, do I have to explain everything? I was going shopping on Wednesday, and Sasuke wanted me to take you, too. He_llo_."

"Oh." I bit my lip in thought. "Um, Sasuke and I aren't really together anymore. It fell apart." I would have told her everything—that Sasuke had trapped me into becoming his girlfriend, that Sasuke had forced me to choose to go shopping, that Sasuke had . . . Well, that I had broken the deal. But he deserved a reputation, and a better one than what I could make it.

Ino's jaw had dropped open. "Really? You're not together?"

I nodded.

"Really?"

"_Yes_, now can I get to my seat?" The bell would ring soon, and even though Kakashi arrived five minutes late on the spot, I still liked to look over the lesson and understand it a little before it was taught.

Ino smiled. "So Sasuke's open again?"

"Uh, yeah, of course," I answered, looking around the room to make sure Sasuke wasn't close enough to hear. I gasped when I realized he wasn't even in the classroom. "Hey, can you do me a favor, Ino?"

She eyed me suspiciously. "After what you did?"

"Think of it as payment for me dumping Sasuke," I suggested. "Just a tiny, tiny favor."

She sighed. "What is it?"

"Tell Kakashi I felt sick and that I'm sorry when he comes in. Tell him I just went to the bathroom is all."

Ino nodded. "Right."

Then I raced out of the classroom and rushed down the halls to find Sasuke. I had seen him in P.E. He had been doing okay, or so it had seemed. He still wasn't over what had happened on Wednesday. I could still see a very stressed look in his eye, every time he looked at his friends or me—or Tenten.

Luckily the school wasn't too big. There were only a few places he could be. I heard a few voices coming from the one girls' bathroom and entered it curiously. Why would I think Sasuke was in a girls' bathroom? Well, I wasn't really sure why.

But I had been right. Tenten and Sasuke were both in there, Tenten with her head under the sink, and Sasuke watching her closely. The water was falling through her greenish hair, and beside Sasuke were two bottles of shampoo and conditioner. Apparently they believed no girls would be going to this particular restroom during class . . . Or Sasuke did, at least.

Tenten knew it was me, even from washing her hair under the water. "What are _you_ doing here?"

I rolled my eyes. No wonder everybody seemed to hate her. But I ignored what she asked with dignity. "Sasuke, math, remember?"

He shrugged. "I hate math. Why aren't you in class?"

"Checking on you."

He sighed and turned away from me. "I'm okay. Just drop it."

"You're _not_ okay. Not on Wednesday anyway."

"It's Friday." Sasuke's eyes flashed warning glares at me. "Two whole days."

I put my hands in the air out of frustration and groaned. "You're the one who called me on Wednesday. What was I supposed to do? Just let you try to starve yourself or whatever you were going to—"

He cut me off swiftly. "Never happened."

I raised my eyebrows in shock. "Hell, it didn't."

"It never happened," he repeated. "Just go back to your perfectly happy life where you never smoked, never drank, never did anything bad but defended yourself from me or my friends."

I didn't want to leave. "Once," I whispered before he could yell at me.

He frowned at me. "Once what?"

"I did something bad once."

"That cigarette at my house didn't count—"

"I _know_ the damn thing doesn't count." I drew in a deep breath. I hadn't even told Naruto and Hinata about this—I had lied. I hadn't told my _parents_ about this! Why the hell was I telling Sasuke? Only because I wanted to? "A party, late one night. Ino was drinking and drinking. She was giddy and just . . . perfect. Even though she got dizzy a lot, she looked so _happy_." I raised the back of my hand to wipe my eyes. "It was back when my family didn't really have a home. I'd have given anything to be happy. And I was curious from seeing my mom not _enjoy_ drinking and not _enjoy _being happy all the time. I wondered why the hell someone would want to quit."

Sasuke was silent. He didn't speak a word, but I could tell from the intensity on his face that he was listening.

"Ino poured a cup for me," I continued. "She said, 'Stop whining about your life. We all have it bad.'" I shrugged. "It wasn't anything like I had imagined. It wasn't happiness at all; it was a surge of arrogance. It felt as if . . . I had lost control. Like a car without a steering wheel, without a break. Once you start, you just can't stop yourself from—from anything. I _never_ want to live through that again."

Sasuke took in the information in silence for a moment. "It's true that we all have it bad," he finally agreed. "But the smarter ones know when something's good."

I smiled gratefully at him. Suddenly I remembered Tenten, whose existence had faded from my mind, and she still stood there washing out the dye in her hair. My face heated up, and I clasped my hands together. She had heard my entire confession.

The girl lifted her head from the sink and used a towel she had brought to dry her bangs off. "God, it just won't come out," she whined staring closely at the mirror as if the greenness would disappear.

If only there was some way I could help her. "What brand did you use?"

"If I fucking knew that, I wouldn't be in this mess." She chucked the towel on the floor and folded her arms under her head on the counter. Shoulder's shaking, she produced slight sobbing noises that were muffled by her arms.

Sasuke placed a hand on her shoulder, and I gasped at his sudden, unexpected compassion. "Everything will be all right." He patted her on the shoulder.

"No!" she screamed, jumping away from him. "Nothing is _ever_ all right at this damn school!" Her eyes studied me up and down for a moment until she turned back to Sasuke. "Your girlfriend's right. You could have stopped them, and I could have made the basketball team! You're a jerk, Sasuke! That's all you'll ever be! _Ever_!" She reached on top of the counter for her backpack and barged out the bathroom before either of us could get in a response. I could see her trip over her still injured ankle before quickly getting up and stalking-limping off.

I glanced at Sasuke, and was not really surprised at what I saw. His wild depression had not gone away. His eyes showed the urge to strike at anyone who grew too close or to retreat from people he feared. When his eyes landed on me and glared viciously, I backed up against the wall and tried to stay calm. "She'll come around," I promised. "She'll regret what she said."

He didn't seem to hear a word I said. "Get away from me."

"Get away from _yourself_." I was sick of him whining and complaining about his life was just _so_ hard. But really, I didn't see how bullying could be any worse than being bullied. He had hurt me a lot in the past. "Take a vacation from being so insensitive and see what it feels like to get squashed like a bug."

He stepped forward instantly and pressed me against the wall. "Remember that deal we made? Well, I'm about to enforce my side of it. On Monday. You and your two sorry friends."

I glared at him. "Back to your normal self, huh? The one always bragging, always bothering me about my natural pink hair. I guess I should be thanking you. I can't keep lying to Hinata and Naruto anymore. They wouldn't understand how I _was _trying to help you. Was."

He pushed me harder against the wall.

I withheld a grunt. "I'm sorry, Sasuke. I really thought you could change."

"Shut _up_," he whispered, his voice fierce and demanding. "I've had enough of your insults."

Smiling at him with false politeness, I shrugged. "It's the truth."

Bad mistake.

He kicked me in the shin, and I almost fell when my leg gave out. I couldn't even feel it. I couldn't even move it. I began to scream until he put a hand over my mouth. "I will hurt your friends so _bad_ that they end up in a hospital with tubes sticking out of their mouths. Either agree to my last deal or watch them suffer. Of course, I'll make sure to spare you if you don't agree to my terms. I know how much you _love_ getting through _together_ with your friends."

I struggled under his hand holding my mouth. He moved it away. "Do I have a time-limit?" I asked sarcastically. "Monday morning to decide?"

"No. You decide right now."

I sighed. From the moment he had said what he had said, I really didn't have a choice. "I guess I have to agree, your _majesty_."

He balled up a fist and threw it into my gut. I coughed out blood in response. Pain lurched through my abdomen as I bit back the tears. My temper would be my permanent grave marker from now on, I thought sarcastically.

"Let's go back to class." Sasuke dragged me out of the bathroom and down the hallway to Hatake Kakashi's classroom.

I already felt the wind of freedom still and elude me. When a ship at sea lost its wind, it was stuck. No air to push it and no way to get back. An impasse.

I had heard stories of a place called the Doldrums, a stretch of sea without wind, without waves, without a push of any kind. And when a ship or a boat got trapped there, it could never set sail again.

I was the sailor at sea.

* * *

"Sasuke," I started as I followed him toward the bus.

"Sasuke-kun," he corrected.

I couldn't see his face. Only his back. "I don't have a bus pass."

His shoulders dropped in a heavy sigh, and he turned around. "Here." His hand outstretched to reveal ten dollars. "Just tell them to keep the change."

"Okay." He began walking again, though this time I lingered behind. Hinata had sneaked up behind me without the Uchiha knowing, and I knew her question before she asked it. "Another deal," I whispered to her.

"I thought . . . Well, I . . . You decided not to." Hinata began to twiddle with her fingers as she always did when she was nervous.

"Naruto said we should live through Hell together. Sasuke threatened to hurt only you two. I don't want that to happen. I don't want to stand by and watch as you two become the only victims of his games. I'll live through this myself. Just think of how you would feel if offered a choice to be spared or take all the hurt for your friends." I stared her with my most dedicated stare. "I still hate him," I promised and grinned.

She smiled. "He's about to look at you."

I raced away from Hinata and pretended as if I had dropped the ten dollars by accident.

"Sakura, get over here!" Sasuke yelled.

I ran to his side and got on the bus. Ino had saved a seat for the Uchiha, and he sat down beside her. A chubby kid named Chouji who had at first been sitting in the third spot, got up and moved away, fear of being teased plaguing him. I sat down in the place he had abandoned—next to Sasuke.

Ino stared at me reproachfully and then seemed to shrug with her eyes. "You two are awfully confusing. One minute you're together, and the next you're not."

Smirking, Sasuke settled deeper into his seat. "We'll be sticking together for a while now, so don't panic yet."

She grinned. "Oh, worry, all right. I've been panicking since the moment I first saw her with you." Sasuke chuckled at her statement. "Say," Ino wondered aloud. "You want her to go shopping again?"

"Yes, if you will."

"All right with me! Thank God all my plans didn't go to waste." Her shallow, blue eyes glanced at me. "Do you ever talk anymore, forehea—Sakura?"

"Um, yeah, of course," I mumbled and smiled. Someone who knew me well enough would realize at once that my smile was false. I thanked whatever luck I had that Ino no longer _knew_ me.

"Well, usually you're so loud and obnoxious," Ino continued. "Never stop talking. You seem so quiet today."

_Speak for yourself_, I wanted to say until Sasuke nudged me. I had to come up with an excuse. "Yeah, like, my pet fish died this morning," I said, attempting a grieving voice. It didn't really work that well. I could see that much from the irritated look on Sasuke's face.

"Whatever." Ino shrugged as if to rid herself of my little white lie. "So is tomorrow all right with you?"

"Huh?"

"Did you go to Mars or something? We have to go shopping again!"

"Oh." Maybe I _had_ taken a small vacation off earth. I felt so confused and so lost. I wanted to get away from Sasuke, but there was this invisible chain linking my hand to his. No escape! Whether from the fear of him hurting my friends of the fear of him hurting myself I wasn't sure.

"Sakura, pay attention."

"Oh, yeah, sure, tomorrow's fine." I wondered how many times she went shopping anyway.

Sasuke chose that moment to change the subject. "Have you heard the rumor?"

Ino leaned forward. "There's a new rumor?"

"Kiba said Tenten's current hair color is natural. He said she gets it dyed brown every other week."

The blonde girl laughed. "No way! Really?"

"He lives with her, so he should know."

"Oh, yeah. I keep forgetting. I mean, they aren't related. They just live together since Kiba's parents adopted her, right? So confusing . . ."

"Not really."

"Speaking of rumors, did you hear about how Hinata used to be a junkie . . ."

I drowned out the words that were filling my head. Everything—the words were all lies. I couldn't stand what I was hearing. Coming out of Sasuke's own mouth was a rumor, obviously a complete _lie_, that Tenten had such an ugly shade of hair. I knew for a fact it had been dyed. And now that I knew Kiba lived with her, I could guess who the culprit of her sudden hair color was.

And then Hinata! Hinata was not the sort of person who would become addicted to drugs. Yes, she would crumble under peer pressure, and I would never be surprised if she drank a few glasses or breathed in a bit of smoke. But addicted? Not Hinata, and I knew more about her than these two pretended to know. I wanted to punch them both in the face, to tell them how they were sick and gross. I wanted to leave and never come back. But this new deal was important, and I _needed_ to keep it.

The bus suddenly lurched to a stop.

Ino got up and began to leave. "Okay, Sakura, see you at, uh . . ."

"My house," Sasuke finished for her.

"Okay, see you at Sasuke's house tomorrow."

And Saturday had come sooner than expected. In my opinion shopping was extremely boring. I just didn't see the lure that trying on so many different clothes could bring. But I was glad to be away from Sasuke for a while. And, at least, Ino was having a bit of fun dressing me up and choosing exactly what kind of clothes looked best on me.

In the end I bought quite a bunch of clothes, and then grimaced at the cost.

"Don't worry," Ino said as my eyes widened in fright. "Sasuke gave me a credit card to use for you. How nice. You won't even have to spend a dime."

I wondered how I would hide this new "hobby" of mine from my parents.

Ino swiped the credit card through the machine as she bought all the items through a self-checkout. "Sakura, you have to call me every morning, and I'll tell you what to wear, okay?"

I closed my eyes as if I never would have to see the burdens being placed on my shoulders again.

"You must really hate shopping." Ino handed me a few of the bags and grabbed some for herself. Then she led me away, her heels clicking gently on the polished floor.

I followed. "Hey, Ino?"

She glanced over her shoulder at me. "Yeah?"

"Can I still trust you?" I remembered the days when we were inseparable. In fact, we had gone to the same kindergarten together and in a way were childhood friends. Our friendship had lasted until first grade, and then was lost. During high school we had rejoined at the hips until last year when I had met Naruto and Hinata.

She could very well have been my only chance to be free. I needed someone to talk to. I needed a _friend_ in this Hell_._ Tenten was a Sophomore—completely unstable and "off-limits" according to Sasuke. The rest were just plain jerks. She was the only one who had the potential.

Ino shrugged and walked through the automatic door.

"I know I probably made you mad when I stopped being your friend in first grade, and then again last year. But right now . . . I really need somebody to listen to me."

She stopped walking, but I didn't notice until I was a few yards in front of her. "Sakura . . . why?"

I glanced back at her, eyes widening when I saw tears were falling down her cheeks. Crystal, sparkling tears that one would see on role models who didn't know how to cry. But just from a glance, I knew hers were real.

"Why did you betray me? I wasn't trying to trick you into anything. You could have been the classic nerd, and I could have been the classic cheerleader. Just because we're different doesn't mean we're automatically enemies. But you . . ." Her eyes fixed me with a venomous glare. "_You_ just thought I was one of those outrageous girly-girls, always painting their nails, always walking down the street like they're being filmed, always using people—their _friends_. I thought we were friends again, like we had been in Kindergarten, but I guess you thought I didn't deserve it."

I studied her and knew at that moment she truly had been my friend last year, and not what I thought she had been. "There's a difference between a popular girl and a friend. I thought you were just a regular popular girl. I was wrong. You can never guess how sorry I am now."

She shrugged and raised a hand to wipe her tears away. It didn't work. Her hand still held a shopping bag that blocked her from touching her own face. "I _hated_ you," she whispered. "In Kindergarten you were such a wimp, afraid to stick your nose in other people's business. The only reason you still don't cry in a corner is because _I_ saved you. The only difference between now and then is that you fight back. I _hate _you for that. You're always shoving your nose up Sasuke's face, even though you wanted to steal him from me in the past. He liked you, you know. I could never get over that. But then you got over your infatuation and left him in the dust. I was the one who had to pick up the pieces. Why do you think I started cheerleading? Because he was always ready to beat himself up over the inability to _please_ you. I needed to _cheer_ him on, even as it broke my heart to pretend I wasn't in love."

I stared at the floor. "All a misunderstanding, I guess."

"Yeah. And now you're in love with him again, strutting around like some Ms. America. You're _dating _him for Heaven's sake. Just when I thought I had another chance."

"_Can_ I trust you?"

She stared at me with glistening, blue eyes. "I wish you couldn't."

Glancing around to make sure no one was listening, I bit my lip. "Sasuke's not my boyfriend. He's being a jerk."

Ino stared at me for a long moment until finally she gasped. She quickly grabbed my hand and pulled me toward her car. "You shouldn't say that in public if that's what it is. You don't who's listening."

Surprised that she knew exactly what I had meant from my one quick sentence, I hopped into the passenger's seat, and Ino sat behind the steering wheel. Placing her keys in, the blonde rolled up all the windows and then finally turned to me. "What happened?" she asked.

I put my head in my hands. Embarrassment and disorientation bit at me until I wanted to cry the tears I'd been holding in so long. "H-He—" My voice broke into a sob. I had never really _cried_ before. So strange.

Ino's comforting hand rubbed my back. "It's okay. The shock's just wearing off, I bet. It might help to talk about it?"

I nodded behind my hands. "He promised to stop bullying me and my friends if I did everything he said for . . . for the rest of high school." My tears didn't stop. I merely held back the choking sobs. "I went along with it for a day or two. But that was . . . only the b-beginning."

"You two 'broke up,' right?" Ino squeezed my shoulder, and the tears finally subsided.

"It was Tenten," I answered, hiding the anger behind my voice. Ino had been part of the group who had teased her. "Sasuke and Tenten were real good friends, and he let her walk home on her own that day. Kiba must have dyed her hair green then."

"That's her natural color—"

"Hell, Ino, it's not! Because yesterday before all this shit happened, she was trying to wash it out!" I screamed.

Understanding completely, Ino nodded. "Get back to Sasuke."

I bit my lip and breathed in deeply. "Sasuke changed when I broke the deal. I found out he smoked on Tuesday, the day before Tenten got hurt. He didn't like bullying anymore, I could tell when Kiba, Neji, and . . . you . . . were hurting her. He called me that night. I don't know why he didn't just kill himself though. He was _really_ upset."

Ino's indigo eyes widened. "Again?"

"What do you mean _again_?"

"Never mind. Your story first."

"I came over to his house and got him to calm down again. Then on Friday . . . Remember when I asked you to tell Kakashi I was sick for a few minutes?"

She nodded.

I felt like crying again. "I was going to find Sasuke. I was afraid . . . that he'd gotten upset again. But he wasn't—not when I first came in at least. I found he and Tenten trying to get the dye out of her hair. But suddenly Tenten just flipped out on him. She started blaming him for everything. I swear, she was his only _real_ friend. And _then_ he got upset. Not in a good way. He's broken, like some caged tiger set loose. He's insane!"

"Oh." The facts seemed to click in Ino's head. "_Oh_. You've got a real problem then."

"I know." I wiped the wetness away with my sleeve. "He said if I didn't become his friend—not just do what he said, his _friend_—then he would hurt Hinata and Naruto. Really bad . . ."

Ino patted my shoulder with her long, slender fingers. "He isn't lying. He _will_ hurt somebody if he doesn't get his way. You have to be careful."

I stared at my hands clasped together in my lap.

"It happened to him once a long time ago. When you stopped liking him. He was _so _upset. Suicide was definitely top of his list. But then all the sudden, he got angry, got mad at anyone in sight. There's only one way to calm him down again."

My eyes flickered to her face. "How?"

She frowned at the windshield and then returned my glance. "You have to kiss him."

* * *

Sasuke stared down at me, his arms folded across his chest. "You and Ino spent a long time at the mall."

"Shopping," I answered dully.

When I tried to get around him, Sasuke stood in my way. "What did you get?"

I wanted to roll my eyes. "Clothes, of course. Shoes, hair things . . . Stuff . . ." Was Ino really right about how to get him back? The angry look in his cold, onyx eyes unnerved me. I was really afraid. If I kissed him, what would he do? Hit me on the head? Consider it a sign of neglecting the deal?

I didn't want to find out.

But I didn't want to wait a couple of years for this to end either.

"Go to my room and sit patiently on my bed like a good little girl." He finally stepped out of my path and gestured toward the elevator behind him.

His sarcasm was getting annoying. I sighed and walked where he had gestured. This Saturday, Sasuke had ordered me to come to his house for dinner. And lunch, and breakfast. I was also supposed to return for Sunday. And _then_ if I wasn't tightly obeying his ever-strict rules, then he would starve me.

Again, my thoughts returned to what Ino had said. Kiss him? Did she mean just a gentle sibling kiss? Maybe she thought I should go all the way through and make-out. Knowing Ino though, when she said kiss, she meant just a full and meaningful kiss of two lovers in public. Nothing more. Nothing less.

I sighed.

Before last year, I had been madly in love with him. But after I became friends with Naruto and Hinata, he was no longer my crush.

As Ino had put it, Sasuke had loved me. Did he still? Would he allow me to kiss him? Those two questions didn't strike me nearly as much as the next one rushing to my mind.

Could Sasuke's former love for me be what made him want to control me like this in the first place?

Sitting on Sasuke's bed and clasping my hands in my lap like "a good little girl," I waited for what seemed like hours. Hours upon hours. Minutes upon minutes. Then finally the door opened. "Is dinner ready?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I came to tell you that you're going as my date to Prom."

"Wh—" I cut myself off, knowing it was ineffective to argue with him in my situation. "Sure, I'll come with you." Even though it hadn't been really a question, pretending that I was still in charge felt good. "Prom's in a few weeks, right?"

"Yes, three weeks." Sasuke sat down beside me.

I stared at him, and he stared back, longing in his clear, black eyes. For a moment, I thought _Sasuke_ was back. The Sasuke I wanted to protect, the Sasuke who would protect _me_. But then the longing transformed into lust, and I wondered if I had imagined his old self from the beginning. Still, this was my chance—my one chance to kiss him, to find out if he really was who I thought he was.

"Sasuke," I whispered, scooting closer to him. "I have to tell you some—"

Too late.

His lips pressed against mine. I edged away so quickly that I didn't even realize I had moved. Then air filled my lungs as I gasped for breath. An arm wrapped around my back and pulled me toward him again. I took in a deep breath once again. I didn't want to do this! Sasuke was my enemy! Sasuke was the _last_ person I wanted to kiss!

And now he was forcing me to kiss him!

I wanted to scream.

He pushed me down onto the bed, caging me under his body. No escape. I tried to shove him off, but he held my arms down. "You were very good today." His voice sent cold shivers down my spine, even if it was only a whisper. "I promise, it'll be short."

Sasuke had completely lost control. At that moment I was sure.

* * *

"It doesn't work that way," Ino remarked as she led me down the halls. Apparently Sasuke believed that I needed supervision twenty-four seven. But luckily Ino was a friend. "_You_ have to kiss him. He can't kiss you," she continued.

I rolled my eyes. "I _did_ kiss him. He said our deal would die if I didn't."

"You have to _want_ to kiss him then." She shook her head, as if at herself, and stopped walking. "He's lonely right now. His only friend hates him, and he has no _real_ friend, except maybe you for the time being. Kissing him _truly_ helps because he realizes there's someone who cares enough to do that for him—for his own sake. But when somebody does just the opposite, like Tenten did last Friday, he gets a little forceful about friendship."

"A little?" I frowned and continued to walk, Ino following quickly behind me. "Why though? He's acting like an idiot from the luny-bin," I commented casually.

"It's just the way he is when he's alone. You can't change that."

"Huh." I mulled over her words for a few seconds before I could continue. "So what if somebody proved they loved him _all_ the time?"

"Then there'd never be a problem," Ino answered instantly.

* * *

**A/N: **Hey, I promised some of you that I would update a few Mondays ago. The thing is my computer crashed, and I really didn't feel like writing out the whole thing... So... I waited--and waited--and waited. And finally my patience was rewarded!! Haha. My dad found someone who could recover my stuff for me, so now that he has and I have my new computer, I'm finally updating. Hope you enjoy, and sorry it took so long. This was actually one of my favorite chapters to write. :) I was also a bit happy when I edited it ('cause it doesn't suck as bad as I thought, LOl). Well hope you liked.

Oh yeah, and OMG! Thanks SO much for all those reviews. Man, 55 for 4 chapters? Thanks so much you guys! :D Well, anyway, bye. :) Next chapter later. Hopefully soon.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:** Okay, this is going to be the crappiest chapter, I've ever, ever posted, and that's _exactly _why I never wanted to post it. :'( I wrote it so long ago, and it's so gay (for lack of a better word, lol)... But finally I decided to heck with it, and that I'd post it. It's not like I'm ever gonna completely revise it since my inspiration ran out about a year ago (which was when I finished writing the story), so... all I can say is.... _I'm so sorry it sucks!!! Please forgive me!!_ Lol... Anyway, I hope you enjoy it, despite the stupidity of it... Sorry. :'( I feel so guilty, lol... I didn't even edit it at ALL since reading it again would completely change my mind about posting it... Thanks for all the reviews because they're what finally convinced me to post it and get it over with. Hope you like. :-/ -holds breath in anticipation-

"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?  
__Holding too tightly,  
Afraid to loose control.  
_'_Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you.  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,  
And every second I waste is more than I can take.  
I've become so numb,  
I can't feel you there."_

—Lincoln Park

**Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl**

_Chapter Six_

There had to be a reason I would _want_ to kiss Sasuke. Two weeks had passed, and I was sure I wouldn't live another day of this Hell. Every night, he would send me to his room. And every night, I would miss out on dinner in his room. Every night, I was trapped in his deals, in something I wished I could erase. I wanted to _die_ even. Sometimes the nausea was so terrible, I just wanted to fall asleep right-side up and drown in it. At least, the pain would dissipate, and I could be at peace.

There just had to be a way I could _love_ him, if only for a moment.

The door opened, relieving me of my thoughts. "Sasuke," I started.

"What?" He slammed the door shut.

"Can we just . . . _talk_ tonight?"

At first, stubbornness was the only emotion in his eyes. But he didn't move. I waited patiently until an idea seemed to pop up in his mind, a light bulb could have went on above his head. And then the stubbornness vanished. "Let's play a game," he suggested.

I suppressed a sigh of relief. "What game?" The enthusiasm ripped through my voice like a shark through water.

"A mind game. You tell me something, and I tell you something."

"Oh." My enthusiasm had disappeared. I _really_ didn't want to go around spilling my deepest secrets to him. But I didn't have much of a choice either. "So? What do you want to know?"

"Do you have a sibling?"

"Y—" No, a "yes" would be a lie. I would tell the truth, and hopefully Sasuke would tell _me_ the truth. "No . . . I have—_had—_a little brother. He died in a car accident when I was five. I don't really remember him." I paused and thought of a return question of equal value. "Tell me how your brother used to be. That picture—" I pointed to the one upside-down on his desk— "showed you all together, and you were happy."

He didn't answer for a long, long time. I wondered if he ever would. He just sat there, in silence, in his own mind, probably thinking about whether it was worth it to tell me or not. Finally he said, "I'm tired of this game. Lay down on the bed."

"That's not how the game works." Somehow I stopped my arm's urge to just punch him in the nose. "I told you about myself, you tell me about yourself."

Sasuke's hands shot up and shoved me onto my back. The mattress stopped my descent roughly. "You do what I say. Got it?"

I nodded and winced. Tears welled up in my eyes and leaked onto my ivory skin. He played with my hair for a while. It was past my shoulders now, and the length partially pleased him. Sasuke still wanted it longer. I wanted it short again. Suddenly he leaned forward to kiss me. Preparing to be still and motionless for the rest of the evening, I closed my eyes and readied myself for the sinking pit in my stomach the moment his lips would meet mine.

The kiss never came.

Warily I opened my eyes, and saw him halfway there. Maybe he wasn't sure that he wanted this anymore. Maybe I would be free!

Sasuke avoided my gaze. "Itachi protected me. I thought he _loved _me. We played together, washed dishes together sometimes, watched T.V. together. It must have all been fake. I found out that one night."

_What one night?_ I wanted to ask, but I knew his fragile mood wouldn't remain intact for long. It probably would crumble back to insanity before he got a chance to finish his story, especially if I spoke.

"It was nothing really," Sasuke continued. "I just woke up at midnight to find a knife to my neck. I was seven." His voice trembled as he spoke, though he tried to cover it up with a neutral expression. Even without all that, his hands, holding my shoulders down, still shook with each beat of his heart. "For a week he came to my room. He said, 'Sasuke, don't tell your parents,' each night. Except on the seventh day. 'Mother and Father are dead, little brother. Or they will be, at least. Someday in your near future. I'll rip out their organs in front of your eyes. Then I'll kill you. Warn them, and all of your death's will only come quicker.' I can't ever forget."

My eyes widened.

He turned away and faced the wall as he rose to his feet. "He's never been the same since."

"Sasuke . . . That's . . . That's terrible. You should have told the police—"

"Don't you think I've already fucking thought of that? What if he finds out? My parents will die and . . ." His desperate voice cut off in a wave of tremors. "I'll be all alone forever. Completely and utterly alone."

"No," I whispered gently. "You'll never be alone."

Never alone.

The wind pushed the trees against his window, and the brown branches scraped against the glass. I could hear, even though the drapes completely veiled the light of the bright, full moon.

Sasuke turned around, all evidence of his fear and grief gone. "You're the first person I ever told, you know. And the last."

This time, it was _I_ who dropped from his gaze. "Become a good person again, and you'll never have to worry about this again. You'll never be alone. Never alone."

* * *

A chilling scream broke through the air as Sasuke and I at lunch. I longed to get up and stop it from happening, but my choices were limited. Stop the fight, and create more fights—one would lead to the other. I wished I could kick something. But that would cause a fight, too.

"I heard green's your natural color, you little baby," said Kiba, who had Tenten trapped under his weight facedown and in the dirt. "Why don't you just go dye it again? Cost too much?"

"_You_ fucking dyed it!" she screamed. Her struggling began again.

Kiba shoved her face back to the ground. "Not the right answer."

"He's suffocating her!" I cried out and jumped up from the table.

Sasuke grabbed my hand. "He knows what he's doing. She won't die."

I glared at him. "How the _hell_ does he know what he's doing? He's _hurting_ her! Isn't that enough for you?"

He shrugged. "Lunch doesn't end for another thirty minutes, and teachers don't really come over here." He started reaching into his backpack and fished out a pack of cigarettes. "Want one?"

"No, thanks. I don't smoke." Glancing at the tiny crowd, I really wondered if _none_ of them would so much as get help or something. I looked back at Sasuke, and gasped when I saw a held cigarette dangling in front of my face, already lit and everything. "I said _no_."

His hand didn't move. "Want one?" he repeated.

Finally I realized it was an order, not a question. _No, this isn't right._ And it wasn't right. But it was the truth. Hinata and Naruto—I just had to keep thinking about them. I took the cigarette.

A coughing fit erupted in my lungs immediately, and I gasped for breath. This thing _hurt_. But with every inhale of the smoke, the sight of Tenten being held, face in the dirt, being kicked occasionally—yes, it no longer became much of an immediate threat. Even when Neji walked over and traded places with Kiba.

I wasn't upset. But I could still be curious. "Why do they pick on her more now?"

Sasuke took a puff out of his own cigarette. "I'm not protecting her anymore. With the casual statements. You know, 'Let's go find Sakura to tease,' or, 'Class is about to start.' But I don't really care anymore."

The selfish bastard. I stood up and threw my cigarette away. Then I yanked Sasuke's out of his mouth and threw that in the garbage, as well.

"What the hell are you doing?" Sasuke had jumped to his feet, his onyx eyes glaring at every inch of my body, at once. It felt as though he could see through my clothes, through my skin, and into me. I shuddered. He already knew what was there anyway.

"That's what made you crash last time, remember? Besides, I am _not_ making out with somebody who smells like smoke."

He rolled his eyes and sat back down. "That's your last free B."

I sat back down, slumping my shoulders, and rested my chin in my hands. I wanted that cigarette back so badly. Every time I heard Tenten yelp in pain from within the crowd of students. I wanted it back! Even though it tore through my throat and choked me, at least I didn't have to think about anything else except struggling to breath.

"Never mind, you're right," I whispered to Sasuke. "Can I have another one?"

"They're expensive. Stop wasting them." But he gave me one, nonetheless.

* * *

My one day of freedom—he had promised me the last Friday of the month. I could do _anything_ I wanted on that day that seemed to have loomed so far in the future only days ago. But it had been a month since our deal, and since I had been so "good," he decided I deserved one tiny break.

I strolled up to Naruto and Hinata, who were beginning to walk home. They were first. No one else. "Hey, you guys." I took my place beside Hinata since Naruto was walking backwards to talk.

"H-Hello, Sakura-san," Hinata greeted politely.

Naruto nodded a greeting, though something in his eyes looked stressed. "So what's up, Sakura-chan?"

I could infer what he was really asking. "He gave me a free day." I shrugged. "Guess he had a nice streak."

Naruto grinned, but the gesture didn't reach his eyes. I looked at Hinata, who seemed just a tiny bit more nervous than she was before. "Is something wrong?" _Obviously_ something was wrong. And I already knew the answer. I rephrased my question before asking again. "Should I . . . leave?"

"N-no!" Hinata nearly yelled.

I looked at her in shock. Hinata—yelling? I stopped walking when overwhelming grief hit me in the face.

Naruto realized my distress and put a hand on my shoulder. "Lots of things have changed."

Tears spilled down my cheeks. "So . . ." I couldn't say anything. They were my only friends. Where would I be without them? Some recovered fragments of a friendship with Ino. A half-lunatic for a boyfriend that would fuck me almost every night. One day of freedom, so wonderful, and yet with nothing to do, no one to hang out with. Had I really missed out on everything? "Are we still . . ." I couldn't even finish my own statement.

Naruto's hand squeezed and then let go of my shoulder. "What are you talking about, Sakura-chan? It's nothing to be upset over."

Right. I shouldn't have been upset. This was what I deserved. "Well, bye then." For some reason, my legs just wouldn't move. They were rooted to the spot, stuck.

"N-Naruto-kun," Hinata stuttered. She suddenly assumed a hunched position, one hand clasping over her mouth and the other one clutching her abdomen.

Naruto-_kun_. When had that changed? It had always been Uzumaki-kun.

"It's okay, it's okay." Naruto patted Hinata on the back. "Nobody's watching, except Sakura and me. Don't be embarrassed."

Hinata knelt down to the shrubbery beside the sidewalk and began to heave. Stunned, unable to move, I stared at her, and watched as Naruto rubbed his hand comfortingly on her back. "What the hell is happening?" I asked. "Am I still your friend or not?"

Hinata's fit disappeared, and Naruto glanced up at me. "Huh?" He paused and scratched his head. "Oh. _Oh_. No way, Sakura-chan! It's not like that! It's just . . . Well . . . Hinata and I have a problem."

Instantly fearful, I drew in a deep breath. "What problem?"

"Well . . . You see, I . . ." Hinata smiled. "Naruto asked me out. We've been dating for a month and a half."

Naruto grinned, and this time, it did reach his eyes. "Yep!" His face suddenly turned gloomy. "We were just . . . about to talk about what to do."

"About me?" I guessed.

"No, silly!" Naruto laughed for a few moments. "I was asking Hinata if she wanted an abortion."

A gasp escaped my lips, and my eyes widened. Them holding hands, Hinata so upset, Naruto so stressed, Hinata throwing up . . . It all made sense! "Oh, well, uh—I, um—I see. Congratulations?"

Hinata's hand rubbed around her abdomen. "I'm getting an abortion."

What?

"Whatever you want," Naruto told her. "It was a total accident."

I shook my head at them. "Why? It's . . . yours. Who knows? In ten years, you might not have something that's _both_ of yours anymore! You might break up."

"No," Hinata spoke softly, as tears began to glisten near her eyes. "We won't break up. Besides . . . this baby. I don't want it to live like some of the kids at school do. It sounds awful, but . . . Would _you_ want to live if you were this child?"

I debated the issue for a moment. Hadn't this past month been too much of a burden to bear? Hadn't I felt like dying every once in a while? Yeah, people always said that I didn't have it as bad as people in third-world countries, but . . . At least, third-world countries—the children were all the same. They were all in it together. But _I_ had seen better. I could dream of _living_ better. And I would _never_ want my own child to live the life I was living. "You're completely right, Hinata. Completely right." I paused and a smirk tainted my face. "So Naruto, you didn't use a condo—"

My cell phone rang, and I checked the caller identification. Sasuke. "It's my free day," I thought out loud. But as I answered the phone anyway, my voice somehow decided to take a will of its own. "What?" it snapped.

There wasn't an answer. All I could hear was the sound of heavy breathing.

"Hello?" If this was a joke, it wasn't funny. I wasn't laughing. "Sasuke, if you want to go back on your terms, fine, but do it on your _own_ time please?"

"S-Sakura . . . help me please." Sasuke. His voice was its usual coldness, but I heard the fear and begging inside, threatening to overwhelm him. "Please."

I ran my free hand through my hair. "Hey, I'm a little busy, right now. Call back later?"

"_Please_, Sakura. I'll do anything, if you . . ." He paused, and I heard him hold his breath. His breathing stopped. Any longer, and I would have hung up. But he continued from where he left off after quite a few seconds. "Don't come to my house, okay?" His tone was a whisper now. I could barely hear him.

Something was terribly wrong.

"Sasuke? Is everything okay—"

"Shh, shh. Whisper please."

I listened to him. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Itachi—he . . . My parents . . . If I . . . Well, you j-just should know. Don't come. I just needed someone to talk to before . . . he finds me."

Realization hit me strongly, and I froze. "What?" I had imagined the night he had spilled everything to me about his brother, or I had thought I did. But the tone of his voice, his words, everything—I had no choice to believe that I _hadn't _been dreaming. Just thinking about Itachi could scare me now that I knew Sasuke hadn't been lying to me.

His tone cracked under the pressure. "I'm scared. Really scared. Just keep talking to me . . . Please."

So sincere. "Where are you?"

A small pause. "The bathroom. The door lock works better here."

"You have to get away from that house."

"I'm trapped, Sakura. The only way is through the front or the back door, and they're three floors down. I can't . . ." He took a deep gasp of air and let it out. "He'll catch me. I can sense . . . him _waiting _for me."

"Just . . ." What could I do for him? "Just stay calm," I whispered. Then I thought. In the bathroom, Sasuke had said. There was a window in his bathroom. One with a screen and a removable windowpane. "Sasuke, does he know you're in there?"

"He knows I'm on the third floor."

I gathered up all the information on Sasuke's house that I could. There was also an overhang by the front door, though the bathroom wasn't over that door. There _were_ a few ledges for each floor, however. Just for decoration. I thought it looked nice, but this could save Sasuke's life. "Okay, listen. Look out the window. There should be a ledge."

I heard soft footsteps as he tiptoed to the window, and a little creak as he took off the screen. "Yeah, there's a ledge."

"You have go _on_ that ledge, and climb sideways—"

"Hell, no, please. God, Sakura—"

"Now's not the time. It's either that or through the door."

A pause filled with heavy breathing. "I understand," Sasuke said quietly. "Do you have a plan after that?"

"I've crawled through a window before. If you want to make it ambiguous, you have to pull the screen with you. It's good leverage, so you don't fall out anyway." I closed my eyes and prayed that he wouldn't fall. "After that, climb toward the front door. It's two floors down. Just climb the ledges, and you'll get to the over frame. Or just hide there for a while."

I heard a slight moan. "I'm going to die," he whispered.

"I'll call the police. They'll be there in a few minutes. You'll be safe."

"No police." His voice was strained and terrified. Trying so hard to stay calm. "Please don't call them."

"Why not?"

"The knife. It has my fingerprints on it . . . I—"

"Explain it to them. They'll understand."

He choked and held back another cough. "You don't get it . . . Just . . . No police." I heard a loud pounding noise. It seemed powerful enough to break down the door—Sasuke's bathroom door. The pounding continued, and I heard Sasuke begin to sob. "He's trying to break in. I'm scared."

"The window, Sasuke, the window," I whispered. "Your only chance." Then I hung up. Sasuke's house was within walking distance. I ran, ignoring the strange glances Naruto and Hinata gave me. I kept running and running, the wind pushing away all my tears. I had a plan.

As I ran, I dialed the police's number. The minute someone answered, I screamed Sasuke's address. If I was right, Sasuke wouldn't have climbed out the window. He sounded _way_ too terrified to try that. We _needed_ the help of the police.

After two minutes, I reached his house, and indeed, Sasuke was not up there. Bravery. I had always wondered what bravery was. The absence of fear. The understanding of fear. The succumbing to fear and forcing it to help you. None of those. I realized that it was the _ignorance_ of fear. Ignorance, such a foul word.

The door to Sasuke's house was unlocked and nearly unhinged. I shoved my phone back into my pocket and raced to the kitchen. Itachi wouldn't hear me from the third floor. I knew that from experience. Grabbing a knife, I raced into the elevator and rose to the third floor. There was an overwhelming silence until I reached the bathroom. No Itachi pounding on the door, screaming to be let in.

Yet there were voices.

I listened to the voices. The first was Itachi's. "I warned you. All those years ago. Did you forget?"

"No! No . . . Please . . . don't kill me." That was Sasuke.

"Stand up." A pause. "You're so obedient today."

I crept forward behind the man who should have been Sasuke's brother.

"Now, move closer. We don't want the blood to spill." Another pause. "Good, good."

If Sasuke saw me, he didn't say a word. So absorbed in doing every damn thing his so-called _brother_ told him to do.

"It's time now, Sasuke. To erase everything you have done. Be brave. Just do it now." I could hear the smirk in Itachi's voice. And then gasped when Sasuke brought up the knife he was holding.

And held it against his own neck.

"No!" I screamed and held the knife up against Itachi's back. "Don't move, any of you!" Everyone froze.

Except for Itachi's surprised face, which turned around and stared me in the eye. "You. You were always protecting him, you were. I expected you."

I sunk the blade into his body without thinking. All thought had already been long gone. Anything to save Sasuke from himself—and his brother.

Itachi sank to his knees. "I . . . I'm sorry . . ." He fell to the floor.

The instant he was down, I rushed to Sasuke and pulled the knife from his hand before throwing it out of reach. He had looked at it as if not knowing exactly what it was. It was already stained with blood, stained with his _parents'_ blood. And he had held it to his own heart.

I hugged him and forced him back down to the ground. His hands and chest were warm with crimson liquid that rubbed off on my own clothes. From the amount of his parents' blood on his shirt, I _knew_ his parents would probably die. I only hugged him tighter. Suddenly his arms clutched back and held on to me, his only grip on reality. "What do I do?"

I laughed without emotion. "Explain everything to them. What can they do but believe you? Besides, you're already in the worst school of the country. What worse can they do to you?"

His eyes grew glazed again, and I moved the hair from his face. "You're fine now. You're fine."

The police were arriving. I had heard the sirens, the sirens of the emergency, the sirens of trouble. I did not kiss Uchiha Sasuke.

The sirens were too loud.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: **I can't believe people are still reading this. -hides- It's soo laame!! Guess all a 10review/chapter needs is SasuSaku romance in a highschool story. :P Thanks for staying with it though, and this chapter is NOT edited a TINGE. I hardly even remember what happens in it. Thanks again. ^^ Oh, and by the way, the next chapter is the last. ^^ Cya.

**Narutofan20: **Oh, I agree completely!! I would never have posted this a year ago, and I wish I'd revised back then when I had enthusiasm for it. But I really am wanting to get this story over with, so thanks for the criticism! ^^ I posted this story a year too late to fix the stuff criticized. :P

"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?  
__Holding too tightly,  
Afraid to loose control.  
_'_Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you.  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,  
And every second I waste is more than I can take.  
I've become so numb,  
I can't feel you there."_

—Lincoln Park

Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl

_Chapter 7_

* * *

"_Forehead-girl, forehead-girl, forehead-girl," chanted my classmates in my ears. They screamed and yelled and threw a few rocks at me. I hated my life. Second grade, and already I had thoughts of suicide. _

_Until the first Monday of September in third grade. That day everything had changed. "Hey, I'm Ino," greeted a blonde, who knelt down next to me, scrutinizing my face, my body, my tears. "What's your name?"_

"_Sakura," I mumbled._

"_You're so quiet, I can't even hear you! What's your name?"_

"_Sakura!" Lots of my classmates used that game as well—pretending not to hear me, making me shout things repeatedly without even knowing I was being compelled to do so. I _hated_ being teased. And if she asked me my name again, I wouldn't go along with it._

_Ino's fingers wiped away my falling tears gently. "Well, Sakura, you actually don't look half that bad, so stop crying."_

_I gasped but did not move until she helped me up._

"_Meet me after class today. I'll show you a good way to fix your hair." She smiled brightly. "It'll look beautiful."_

"_Beautiful," I whispered and followed her as a duckling would follow its mother._

OOO

_Uchiha Sasuke, black-eyed, raven-haired son of two wealthy parents, walked down the halls toward his class. I watched him go, almost gaining the courage to talk to him. My mouth opened, but as he walked by, I could make no sound, no noise. Instead, I took in a deep gulp of air and just watched him go by. _

_He was so attractive, so amazing. I had heard he was in the top percentage of all third grade students. If anything, I only wanted to be his friend. But somewhere inside, I could feel a crush developing. I loved Uchiha Sasuke. Would he ever love me? The happy side of him?_

"_Forehead girl, stop staring at Sasuke like that!" Ino screamed from across the hallway._

_Blushing with embarrassment, I took my gaze away from Sasuke. He had probably heard Ino's complaint, and I hoped he didn't think any less of me. If only Ino didn't like Sasuke. If only I was better at hiding my secret love._

_For our friendship was falling apart._

_All over some boy._

OOO

"_Cheerleading's dumb," I said matter-of-factly. "It's not even a sport."_

"_You wouldn't get it." Ino sighed and threw the rest of her lunch in the garbage. "It uses flexibility, strength to hold up other people. We do flips, cart-wheels—"_

"_Save it, please." I took my tray of food and also dumped it in the trash. "I've seen enough cheerleaders to know what they do."_

_Ino smirked. "You should try it, Sakura. It's fun. Better than doing school work all day."_

"_Whatever." We weren't exactly friends anymore. Ino had become an acquaintance, someone to sit with at lunch. Just as I wasn't much more to her. Ino had her own clique of friends, so I didn't feel guilty when avoiding her. The only problem was—that I was alone._

"_Ooh, look, there's Sasuke," she said as her eyes fell on the raven-haired boy entering the cafeteria along with Kiba, Neji, and Sai. _

_My crush on Sasuke had gradually dissipated. I had never gotten around to telling him about my feelings, and eventually said feelings just faded away. I didn't care about him anymore. In fact, I would probably even like to kick his face, ever since he had acquired the hobby of "bullying" people._

"_Oh my god, Sakura! He's looking right at you!"_

_Sure enough, Sasuke's onyx eyes were fixed on my emerald ones, and I looked down awkwardly. The desperate, longing look on his face. What had it been?_

_Not that I cared. "Hey, Ino, I'm gonna go sit outside."_

_Her cheerful façade fell. She knew our friendship had finally shattered. "Okay, see ya." She stood up and headed over toward the table Sasuke had sat up. I went outside._

_I was surprised to find a blond boy under my favorite tree, the cherry blossom tree. My name meant cherry blossom, so I guess I always had a strange feeling of home around a cherry blossom tree. I approached the blond, who was cautiously watching me with steady, blue eyes._

_He didn't appear to be a threat. He actually looked quite friendly. So I sat down next to him and leaned against the tree trunk. "Hey."_

"_Hey," he responded._

_I smiled. "Well, what's your name?"_

"_Naruto." He stared at the air blankly, as if he wanted to ask me something but couldn't bring himself to do it._

_I frowned. "What's wrong?"_

"_Well, I was just wondering," he began and looked at me with a huge grin on his face. "Will you go out with me?"_

OOO

"_Naruto, this is Hinata Hyuga," I introduced. "Hinata, this is Naruto Uzumaki."_

"_H-Hello, Uzumaki-kun." Her cheeks illuminated to an almost florescent red, and I caught her before she fainted. _

_Naruto, oblivious to all that had just happened, grinned a wide smile. "Hey, Hinata."_

_We ate lunch together. Ten minutes before the bell for the next class would ring, Hinata claimed she had left something in her locker and ran to get there. I understood she just needed to calm down after finally being introduced to her true love, compliments to me._

_Naruto put a hand on my shoulder. "Hinata _Hyuga_?"_

_I threw a warning glare at him. "You got a problem with that?"_

_He stared at the ground beneath us. "I mean . . . Well, I was just wondering."_

_I smiled apologetically. The urge to defend my friend had risen so quickly and so intolerably that it had escaped my mouth before I could stop it. Everyone teased Hinata, how she was related to Neji, and they all judged her. They all thought she was a bitch, just because she was _related _to someone. I had grown accustomed to protecting her. "Neji is her cousin," I explained. "Hinata is the daughter of two really rich parents. Neji's always been a bad kid, so he was sent here. Hinata's very kind. She didn't think it was fair that Neji was forced here, so she followed him. And now, they go here together. He still hates her though, and she avoids him."_

"_Right." Naruto nodded and gave me a thumbs-up. "Thanks for telling me."_

"_What about you?" I asked curiously. "What are you doing here?"_

_He sighed, his usual cheerfulness vanishing quickly. "My parents died in a car accident. I was thirteen."_

"_Oh." That was two years ago. He must still have been grieving for his parents. "I'm sorry."_

"_Nah, it's okay. They weren't the best parents in the world," he admitted. "I was sent to an orphanage, and they sent me here. They don't really care whether or not we get an education, just as long as they follow the minimum amount of laws."_

_There was a pause of silence as the information hung in the air. I inferred from it how lonely Naruto must have been, must still be. I grabbed his hand and held it. "I'm glad I met you, Naruto." He would be a nice substitute for my long lost crush on Sasuke. "And yes, I will go out with you."._

_Only later did I realize that Hinata was crying over the prospect of me and him being together. The minute I knew was the same minute I dumped him. He hadn't cared. We had been falling apart anyway, and it was best to just stay friends._

OOO

_Hinata fell to the ground, and cried out in pain. Naruto and I knelt beside her as I patted her on the head, promising her that everything would be all right in the end. Neji approached us, rubbing his knuckles on the hand that had just landed a punch._

_The Hyuga stared up at her cousin, eyes glistening with tears. "Why are y-you doing this?" she desperately asked. "Wh-why?"_

_He smirked. "Can't you say a full sentence without stuttering." Neji threw another punch toward her, but Naruto stood in the way as his anger got the better of him. A fist fight spewed, and a crowd of students gathered, cheering either Neji or Naruto—mostly Neji—on. I tried to stop them, but they only pushed me away._

_Security guards rushed over and stopped the fight. Naruto and Neji served a long detention, a suspension, and almost an expulsion, though the school's threats of being expelled were empty. This was the worst school in the state, possibly even the country. There was just nowhere for us to go, nowhere for them to send us._

_After the suspension, Naruto and Neji fought again._

OOO

"_Hello, Sakura-chan."_

"_Oh, hello, Sasuke-san," I greeted straight back. I put on a fake smile and endured his polite pretense. With him, it was only a matter of time before he began the insults._

"_I saw your mom the other day," Sasuke continued. "At the store. She didn't look so good. She couldn't even afford a loaf of bread."_

_The poverty part of my life was a silly insult. I was accustomed to treatment like he was giving me. I was used to the insults on how I could hardly afford food. So his teasing didn't bother me. "Hmm, that's funny. Because when she came home, she seemed to _have_ that loaf of bread you're talking about."_

_He chuckled slightly. "Yes, I suppose she did get in the end. Maybe she stole it, I don't know."_

_A solid hit to my family. I couldn't take it! I would give anything to kick him in the face, kick him in between the legs. Beat him to a pulp. But suddenly I felt Naruto's hands grab my shoulders before I could lunge forward and attack. "Fuck you, Sasuke!" I screamed as Naruto dragged me off._

_Sasuke took a few steps toward me, faster than I could be taken away. "Yeah, yeah. Fuck you, too. But anyway, I just wanted to ask you. Is your mom okay? She looked really . . . hung over. Was she drunk the night before or something? Or did she quit her drinking problem?"_

"_She quit, you idiot!" I threw Naruto off my shoulders and charged at Sasuke. My hands aimed wild punches while I kicked every so often. Sasuke easily dodged every one of them, and threw a few of his own. Before I knew it, I couldn't see out of one eye, I couldn't breathe, and my nose was surely broken._

_I hated Uchiha Sasuke and his followers, his minions._

_I hated them all._

_Sasuke left my injured body in the custody of Naruto, who took me quickly to the nurse's office._

_The next day, I tried to tackle him again._

OOO

_Every night, I wasn't sure what was a nightmare and what was reality. Though I was positive I could have easily named my reality a living nightmare. I wasn't really trapped. I could have gotten away easily. I could have ran._

_But I wouldn't._

_Hinata and Naruto depended on me. If I abandoned my nightmare, I would abandon their safety as well. In my mind it _was_ a trap, there _was_ no escape, I _couldn't_ have ran. And so I stayed._

_He wasn't even pinning me down. He was making no effort to keep me restrained, for I just sat there like a toy doll, allowing him to do whatever he wished._

_Sasuke ripped my shirt off, and I cringed at the breath of hot air on my neck. His lips were everywhere, or so it seemed. I wanted to vomit, just from the _thought_ of where he was touching me. His hands caressed my chest, and I whimpered, almost begging him to stop._

_Then his lips pressed against my own, and I gasped for breath when they were gone._

_  
"Sasuke, please," I cried. "Stop it." I felt him begin to get down to the real climax of the scene. "Stop it!" I screamed. I was _not_ going to make a mistake and get pregnant. My parents had stressed it so much that it was ingrained in my mind._

_Sasuke stopped._

_I breathed in a deep gulp of air and opened my eyes. Not only my shirt, but he had ripped my skirt and underwear off, too, when I hadn't been paying attention. I backed deep into his mattress, hoping he would just stop, have mercy on me for just this _one_, damn night._

"_Are you going back on the deal, Sakura-chan?" his voice whispered menacingly._

_Wildly I shook my head. "N-no!" I paused. "I just . . . Please don't do this to me, Sasuke-kun. It's going a little too far."_

_He put a finger to my lips and shook his head to silence me. I resisted no more for the rest of the night. I laid as still as a rock, drowning in the endless sea of time._

OOO

_My "monthly woman time" would begin today. I hated it when that happened. Like my mom, mine were normally heavier than usual. I had to go to the bathroom every two hours at the _least_. They were annoying. They drained my time._

_And time was something I no longer had._

_Time was something that Sasuke had taken from me._

_I waited out the long hours of the day. Excuses came easily to me. I easily found quick trips to the bathroom, and still there was nothing. I wondered why. Though my periods were heavy, they _always_ came on the due day—no exceptions. So why wasn't one happening now?_

_Suddenly I remembered how Hinata had been pregnant. A mistake._

_I knew what had caused my sudden lapse in menstrual pattern. _

_A mistake._

_Uchiha Sasuke._

OOO

_It was Prom night, and Uchiha Sasuke had ordered me to come with him. Ino dressed me up in front of her huge bedroom mirror, and I closed my eyes, longing for my deprived sleep._

"_You'll get used to it," Ino promised. "Your mind just has to adjust to the sleeping patterns."_

"_Jee, thanks," I muttered._

_She laughed and took her hands away from my hair. "There, I'm done."_

_I glanced in the mirror and was stunned when I saw myself in a stunning pink dress that perfectly outlined my hair. A green sash was tied around my waist to compliment my eyes. I smiled. Then my pink, bubble-gum hair. It was longer now—much longer [??]. Ino had made a beautiful arrangement, fixed with emerald hair-clips. I was . . . beautiful. "Thanks, Ino. Thanks _so_ much."_

"_Sure," Ino said. "Make sure Sasuke doesn't ruin the dress or anything though. It was expensive, and _I _was the one who paid for it this time."_

_It was the least I could do. I nodded at her. "Right. Thank you."_

_The night came quicker than expected, and suddenly a car honked from outside Ino's house. I raced out to catch it and jumped in the passenger seat. Sasuke sat behind the wheel. He glanced at me when I entered. "You look nice."_

_I swallowed. Accepting compliments from jerks was usually not my thing. But I didn't really have a choice. "Thanks," I responded briskly._

_He sighed. "Please, Sakura. It's Prom. Try to be happy."_

_Maybe I could . . . Just this once._

OOO

"_You were good this month," Sasuke praised as he would a pet. "As a reward, tomorrow you can do whatever you wish."_

_I smiled widely at him. "Really?"_

"_Really."_

_Then I hugged him deeply. I had waited forever for a free day. Finally it had come. "Thank you!"_

"_You're welcome."_

OOO

Lots of legal stuff passed us by, and none of it I seemed to understand. All of it was basically who had killed who and who was hurt. What I hadn't known was that most of the blood on Sasuke's shirt had not been his parents' but his own.

"Did you stab Uchiha Mikoto with this knife?" The policeman held up the knife I had slain Itachi with. I still felt uncomfortable knowing I had killed someone.

"No." I made my voice serious and believable, despite my discontent.

"Did you stab Uchiha Fugaku with this knife?"

"No."

"Did you stab Uchiha Itachi with this knife?"

I gulped before answering. "Yes." I had gulped every time I had been asked. This was no different.

"What is the reason for your offensive action?"

I could answer that question--easily. "Sasuke was in trouble. I did it to protect him and myself."

The officer nodded, stood up, and left the room. A few seconds passed in silence while I breathed in deep breaths of relief. I was no longer afraid. I had never messed up, made a mistake. They would believe me. In fact, this had been the easiest interrogation I had experienced yet. The others required so much detail, so much guilt. Because I _regretted_ being the murderer of Uchiha Itachi.

A murderer. I had become a murderer. The action of killing another person had never even crossed my mind. I had _never_ thought a chance would ever arise. But the moment Sasuke's life had been on the line, I couldn't help but plunge that knife into Itachi's back. I _hadn't_ thought. Acted—I had just acted.

The door opened again, and I practically begged to visit Sasuke. My imagination had taken its toll, images surfacing of a scared kid whose parents had been killed.

The police officer nodded at me. "Yes, you may see him now. But first you should know."

Eyes widening in surprise, I listened to what he had to say. The news was unbelievable! I gasped at the incredible nature of it. How could it be true? But the officer promised it was, and I knew I had to believe him. I wanted to jump with joy! But first—Sasuke.

The man led me to a waiting room, and I saw Sasuke, shivering under a blanket in one of the chairs near the fireplace. I had hardly noticed it was cold. Elation had soured so high that I felt too warm. I sat down next to him, but if he noticed, he didn't say anything.

"Sasuke," I began slowly. "What happened on Friday?" Two days had passed. It was Sunday night now. He should have been able to talk about it. I hoped he would.

He clenched his eyes shut and leaned on my shoulder. I put an arm around him comfortingly when I realized he was afraid of being alone. Then Sasuke began his story. "I was watching television when Itachi stabbed me with the knife," he whispered tearfully. "It hurt so bad. He told me . . . that it would hurt worse if I didn't do what he said. He made me . . . kill my mother, my father. And then I ran away and went to the bathroom and called you. If you hadn't come, I . . . I would have killed myself, too."

Before, in my mind, I had prepared myself for every story imaginable, every unbelievable tale. But this—I wasn't ready for. It hit me like a hard slap to the face, and I wanted to hug him forever, to tell him that it would be all right.

Still—there was a better way to make him happy again. "Sasuke," I began, struggling to keep my trembling voice calm. I was so excited to tell him what the police officer had told me. "It's a miracle, but your family isn't dead. And Itachi just had an extreme case of bipolar. He'll only need to take certain pills for the rest of his life. Everything will be okay."

And it would. There was no lie in my words.

Sasuke laughed happily.

Perfectly at ease.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hehe, I said I'd post it 3 weeks ago, I think... And guess what! This time I actually thought I did. But a review on chapter 7 reminded me I only thought about doing it, never actually did it. So sorry, my bad, lol. Anyway, this is by far the worst chapter of this whole story. Lame ending, lame death, lame everything. Which reminds me, there's a character death in here. I would suggest you don't even read it, like I haven't so you don't have to bear my stupidity, lol. :) It isn't edited/revised or anything, okay? I wrote this a LONG, long time ago (long being a measurement of years), so don't kill me if it's not great. I hardly even remember what happens in it, except that someone dies. Thank you for reviews, and enjoy if you can.  


* * *

**"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?  
Holding too tightly,  
Afraid to loose control.  
_'_Cause everything that you thought I would be  
Has fallen apart right in front of you.  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,  
And every second I waste is more than I can take.  
I've become so numb,  
I can't feel you there."  
_—Lincoln Park

Lost Control  
By SpacePirateGirl

_Chapter 8_

The mob that had gathered was thick and dense. I knew from the moment I had seen it that I wouldn't be able to get through, but I needed to. Every ounce of strength within me had to be gathered. I _needed_ to get through that crowd if it was the last thing I did! It was amazing, how time had changed things.

Only two months ago, I was a virgin. I was a victim of being bullied. Uchiha Sasuke was my worst enemy. Now, I was in the early stages of pregnancy for a baby girl, I watched as others got bullied, I wanted to help Uchiha Sasuke in any way I could.

I was not the only one who had changed.

Sasuke used to bully, but now that was different—right at this very instant. Sasuke had quit smoking, only to start again now. Things were different.

I was no longer a victim, but a spectator. Sasuke was no longer the bully.

And so I was running. With every step I took, the crowd seemed to grow farther away. My mind couldn't process any distance I was overcoming, and I almost lost heart. But, no, I couldn't. My crush on Sasuke had never really disappeared, and I knew it then. I still loved him, and I would_ always_ love him, even if he was a sick bastard who played on my fears. Because sometimes, he could be happy. When someone cared, he would become happy.

I cared.

And I had found my reason to kiss him.

Tenten lay away from the crowd, discarded, like a broken toy. She had been knocked unconscious, and she was bleeding. It was what happened when you gave a typical bad boy a knife. And yet, the crowd gathered still cheered. They were afraid. A thousand people, weaponless, could never confront a single man with a knife—or so they thought.

Pushing and shoving, I finally reached the crowd. The first line was easy. But once I got in, I couldn't move. The crowd was jam-packed. I tripped over someone's foot, and stood up quickly to avoid being trampled.

Why had Uchiha Sasuke done this? Why!

Tenten had been his only friend, his only closest friend. She had betrayed him. Why had he still felt an urge to protect her? He had had me . . . What had changed? What had I done wrong?

I burst through the unbreakable crowd—somehow—and then fell to my knees at the sight.

I was too late.

Blood, red, crimson. Everywhere. Bloody stains on the blacktop, bloody stains on his shirt. Bloody stains on his face.

Crimson.

I crawled over to him and sobbed. "Sasuke," I breathed on his shoulder. Was he breathing? Was he dead? I couldn't feel a heartbeat. But then again, what did I know? Nothing. Nothing!

My eyes whipped around to the culprit. Kiba. Standing behind him were none other than Neji, Ino, and Sai. Ino's eyes were shut tight, and she leaned heavily on Sai for support. He didn't seem to know how to handle a weeping girl. Neji and Kiba were shocked. I could see it in their eyes. So I held out a hand. "The knife," I whispered darkly.

Kiba handed it to me without a second's hesitation. The realization that he might have _killed_ had stunned him completely frozen to where he obeyed even _my_ commands.

I tightened my hold on the weapon, hardly caring that my hand began to bleed. Then I rested my head on Sasuke. Naruto and Hinata, I knew, were watching me, for Naruto suddenly demanded, "Why are you crying, Sakura-chan? He got what he deserved.

Anger boiled under my skin, and I glared sharply at him. "Go fucking get a teacher," I ordered.

He and Hinata left immediately.

Right when I had gotten a chance to prove that Sasuke was never alone, I had been too late. If he died, then I would never be able to kiss him. I feared that the most. But maybe . . . I could do it right now.

I stared at his face for a long time. Rain poured down on us suddenly, and thunder crackled in the sky. More bright flashes of lightning blinded me, but nevertheless, I knelt down and pressed my lips against Sasuke's. At first, I was gentle. I didn't know if he was trying to breathe. But then I felt him return the kiss, and I pushed down harder. The loudest boom of thunder filled the silence.

Emotions zipped threw me as fast as the lightning in the storm. Happiness. Longing. Desperation. _Hope_.

Love.

His eyes opened, and I gradually lifted my lips from his. "Sasuke!" I cried out and hugged him. "You're awake! Does it hurt? Do you feel cold, tired—"

"You're . . . hurting me . . . Get . . . off . . ." he managed to say.

Laughing, I jumped away.

He sat up and groaned. I had seen him protect Tenten from all the way across the field. I had been too stunned to move for a moment until I realized he had been in trouble. So I had made my way over here as fast as I could.

He was okay. He had protected Tenten! He was a good person!

Wait . . . Tenten.

Sasuke seemed to have thought along the exact same lines, for he jumped up and ran over to her, through the crowd of people. Kiba and Neji were gone, probably to help Naruto and Hinata get a teacher. Ino was behind me, along with Sai—both of them were very concerned over the situation.

Once I reached Tenten and sat down beside her, she opened her eyes. Sasuke was the first person she gazed at, and she reached out a hand. He took it in his grasp. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I said a lot of things I didn't mean." She coughed.

"You shouldn't talk," I whispered. "You're probably internally bleeding, and it's best to just stay still and quiet—"

"Shut up," Sasuke warned me, tears welling up in his eyes.

I had never seen Uchiha Sasuke cry.

Tenten took in a ragged breath before laughing. "I never did make . . . the basketball team," she wheezed, still speaking to Sasuke. "You promised you would make sure I did someday."

"I know, I know." He squeezed her hand. "I still promise. You'll make it next year."

She shook her head at him. "There won't be a next year for me."

Sasuke choked out a sob.

"I never meant my threats about Itachi, flirting with him, telling the whole school I was your girlfriend, and stuff. I was just being silly."

He nodded and breathed heavily. "It's okay, I know. Don't worry about things like that."

Tenten's chocolate brown eyes turned to face me. "I never . . . liked you, Sakura . . ." She coughed before she could finish her sentence. "You hogged Sasuke. I got jealous. But now . . . I just want to say I'm sorry. Take care of Sasuke for me."

"No," I cried. "No, you're going to be okay. Just breathe. Stay awake!"

She closed her eyes but not before crystal tears leaked through her eyelashes. "I always wanted a first kiss. It was my dream. I'll never get one now."

Bending over, Sasuke pressed his lips onto Tenten's, who smiled in return. Her eyes were closed, her smile was strong. I couldn't even tell that she had stopped breathing halfway through the kiss. Sasuke backed away, and I heard him almost sobbing uncontrollably. That was when I realized.

Bad things happened to good people.

Tenten . . .

A teacher was running over, and I knew he was professionally a doctor. Naruto and Hinata were right behind him. The teacher knelt down and listened for a heartbeat. "Heart attack. Everybody stand back."

I grabbed Sasuke around the shoulders and pulled him away. He resisted the whole time, but he was too confused to _really_ put up a challenge. I hugged him tightly, crying silent tears of my own.

An ambulance arrived shortly and took Tenten away, but everyone knew she was already dead or dying. The doctor who had arrived said she had about a twenty-five percent chance at survival, but . . . Sasuke and I knew there really was no chance.

We skipped class—Naruto, Hinata, Sasuke, and I—to go to the waiting room. Sasuke had a few stitches, but soon he joined us and sat down in the chair next to me. Tenten would be in surgery, and we would wait to know whether it had succeeded. The awkward silence filled with Sasuke's choking sobs was soon too much for me to bear.

"Hey, Naruto, Hinata?" I asked nervously.

Naruto answered with a glare. "Yeah?" Hinata asked kindly, though the hint of anger in her voice betrayed her.

"Did you guys ever do drugs or alcohol?" I asked curiously. That question had been bugging me forever. I couldn't really trust what Sasuke had said about them being addicts, so I needed to ask them in person. Besides, I really wanted to know—to clear up my embarrassment for drinking that one night, long ago at a party.

Hinata shrugged. "O-once or twice. Not really though."

I smiled at her. Exactly the answer I expected.

His expression finally compassionate, the anger finally gone from his face, Naruto decided to answer. "I used to a _lot_ at my old school. The one Neji used to go to. I was his friend." He sighed and shook his head. "I made a lot of mistakes."

"Everyone makes mistakes," I countered, sensing that he was upset about his errors. "We all just have to grow from them."

"Right."

"Are we still good?" I asked them.

Hinata and Naruto nodded. "Of course," the Hyuga said.

I turned back to Sasuke and rubbed him on the back. His head was in his hands, and although he had stopped sobbing hysterically, I knew he was still crying. He seemed appreciative of the comfort I was giving him because he leaned over closer to me. I wrapped my arm around his shoulder. "It's okay, it's okay," I whispered repeatedly.

A doctor opened the doors, glanced around the room, and approached. His expression was dark and grim. He told us to follow him.

Naruto and Hinata joined hands and walked toward the doctor. I made Sasuke stand up, and we all went into an adjacent medical room. The doctor told us to sit, so Naruto had Hinata take a seat while I allowed Sasuke the other chair. He didn't seem in the right condition to be standing.

"She was still alive when we brought her here," said the doctor. "We had a chance to save her, but . . ."

"But what?" Sasuke demanded in a weak whisper.

"I'm afraid the damage was too deep. She had been internally bleeding, and though we did get her heart to start several times, there was just not enough blood to keep her systems going. I'm deeply sorry for your loss."

Hinata began to sob, and Naruto tried to comfort her. Sasuke was just as upset, though he was trying desperately to hide it. I felt tears spring to my eyes also as the doctor led us out of the room. My tears never fell. I needed to be strong for my friends. "It's okay, guys. We did our best."

Naruto sank his teeth into his lip. "No, we didn't. We just let them . . . We were spectators," he complained, referring to how he and Hinata hadn't ran off to get a teacher sooner.

"We all make mistakes," Sasuke whispered, using my words from before.

Faces in the waiting room turned to us as we left, and it felt awkward to know that they understood how we had lost someone important.

It was awful.

But just as Naruto had said that fateful day when Tenten had refused to be helped—it was the _truth_.

We had to live through it.

* * *

Her legal guardians had come to the funeral. I had the direct impression that they didn't care. They stared as the coffin was buried as if it was some relative's friend or something. Kiba had also arrived, and he seemed the most sincerest out of everyone, besides Sasuke.

When the grave was finished, I stepped forward to lay my rose on it. Sasuke laid his own on her grave, and we both backed way while holding hands. He wasn't crying. He seemed peaceful, as if he was saying goodbye. I closed my eyes to say my own goodbye.

Somebody tapped me on the shoulder, and I opened my eyes to see Kiba. "Yes?" I demanded sharply. He was lucky to have survived the quick trial. Fortunately his parents were wealthy enough to afford a good lawyer. He and Neji had simply been fined after spending a few nights in prison. I resented them for that.

"What do I say to her?" he asked. "She was my step-sister . . . I never meant to . . ."

"You never meant to _kill_ her?" I finished. My voice was cold.

"Forget it," Kiba said and began to walk away.

I bit my lip. "Wait."

He stopped.

"Just tell her you love her."

He knelt down beside her grave and closed his eyes.

On the car ride home, Sasuke's mother Mikoto drove. She and Fugaku had been released from the hospital a week ago, and I was glad to see them alive and healthy. Mikoto was very kind and polite. She was fun to talk to when Sasuke would allow me time.

But this time, the car trip was in silence.

We all mourned the loss of our magnet, the girl who would never be shunned, never be cast away. She had always shown up when we least wanted her, and she had always disappeared when we wanted her the most. Repelling and attracting. She was our magnet.

She was our friend.

And she was gone.

Suddenly Sasuke's hand squeezed mine, and I glanced at him. "What's wrong?"

He frowned at the car floor. "You're free, the deal's off. My mom's driving you home."

* * *

It was a whole new experience to be free. I had never felt so unprotected, so exposed. It felt as though I were naked in a crowd of people. Sasuke had controlled every aspect of my life for months, and I didn't understand what to do with all the extra time I had gained.

Freedom.

Though it was nice and beautiful, I was afraid of it. All this time, I had thought _I _had been the one protecting _Sasuke_, but actually it had been the other way around. He had been protecting me from choices, and that had felt safe. I wanted him back.

"Did you get an abortion?" Naruto asked me at lunch one day.

I shook my head. I had already decided the day of Tenten's funeral. Taking a life was just wrong. Since then, another month had flown, and I still had not told anyone about my decision that was too late to change now. It was time though, and I would tell them. "I'm going to ask Sasuke if he'll still be my boyfriend today."

"What? Why?" Naruto demanded.

An upset expression formed on Hinata's face again.

"He's different now," I promised. "I love him."

"L-last time, we could hardly ever talk to you . . ." Hinata whispered.

I shrugged. "It won't be the same. Last time, he was forcing me. This time, I want to be his girlfriend. I promise, I'll still talk to you guys a lot. In fact, we could go on double dates too since you guys are together. We could all just . . . hang out."

The idea seemed crazy. Hinata and Naruto _hated_ Sasuke with a passion. We all had until I had changed. But to my huge surprise, Hinata smiled, and Naruto grinned. "Okay!" he exclaimed. "Sounds fun!"

"Cool." I flipped my gaze over to see Sasuke standing at the entrance to the cafeteria, and beckoned him to come over. He was so much better now. Although Tenten's death had hit him the hardest of all, he knew she would not want him to waste time thinking about it. And so he was back to his normal self. His _happy_ self. It was as if Tenten would always stand by his side now.

Sasuke sat down next to me, and I introduced everyone, even though they already knew each other.

Naruto stared at me expectantly after the pleasantries had passed. "Well? What about your baby?"

Surprised, Sasuke glanced at me. "You're pregnant?"

I sighed. "Yeah, duh. You'd think it'd be obvious when you didn't wear condoms, and I'm starting to get fat."

Hinata laughed at the two of us, and Sasuke stared at her blankly.

"Anyway, I went to a doctor. He said it was a girl, and I decided on a—"

Naruto jumped up and said. "Oh! Oh! We gotta plan a baby shower! Come on, Hinata, let's go start inviting everybody!" He dragged her off before I had a chance to finish my statement.

"A name," I finished as if the interruption had never happened.

Sasuke chuckled, and it didn't sound forced at all. "So why didn't you getting an abortion? Don't you hate to think that you have a part of me inside your body?"

I shook my head. "Of course not. I _love_ the thought of having something special that's yours and mine. I don't know what I'll do about high school though."

"My parents will help. We'll be okay financially, and they'll watch over our child during school, too."

Nodding gratefully, I did a double-take to scrutinize his face. "We?" Had I heard him correctly? About to ask him if he would still be my boyfriend, he cut me off.

"Yes, _we_." He reached into his pocket and held out a jewelry box. "Not exactly the most romantic type of setting, but . . . "Sakura, will you marry me?"

Hell, what was going on? Was I dreaming? Sasuke had bought a _ring_ over the last month, and now was going as far as to propose to me? Even after everything that he had done to me? Out of the blue, too! Completely out of the blue! Shouldn't our relationship evolve into actually boyfriend and girlfriend first?

It was a little soon to think of _marriage_.

He saw the look on my face. "Well, it doesn't have to be for a couple of years, I was just curious—"

I laughed at him slightly and pressed a finger to his lips. "Of course, I'll marry you. Someday." With my other hand I took the jewelry box from his hand and opened it. An emerald ring. It was beautiful. I placed it on my finger.

The bell rang, and Sasuke and I began to walk _together_ to class. I felt perfectly content. It was wonderful to know I could have him as a husband someday. And I knew I would be safe.

Ino appeared in the hallways as she walked up to me, a grin on her face. "Hello, Sakura, Sasuke," she greeted with a model's politeness.

"Hey."

Sasuke nodded at her.

"So, can I borrow Sakura for a second?" she asked, amused.

I laughed and followed Ino down the hall for a moment. "Something wrong?"

"Nah, I was just wondering if . . ."

"If what?"

"You're pregnant."

"Oh." I had completely forgotten about her obsession over Sasuke, and now that she knew I was pregnant.

Ino sighed deeply and stared at me. "If you hadn't wanted to keep it, then you would have got an abortion. Does this mean . . . I have no chance with Sasuke now?"

"I'm sorry, Ino." To love your best friend's crush was unforgivable, but I couldn't give up Sasuke now either. He _needed _me. "I just . . ."

"It's okay, just wondering. He never liked me anyway. Besides . . ."

"Yeah?"

"I've got a new crush anyway." She was already beginning to walk away.

"Who?" I shouted after her. I was so curious, I wanted to know.

"Not telling!"

But then I watched as she rushed over to Neji and began talking tremendously. I didn't have to ask who her new crush was anymore. They made a good couple anyway—I could tell from the way Neji was responding to her insistent babbles. I shook my head and laughed before returning to Sasuke.

When we both reached our math class, Sasuke stopped and put a hand on my shoulder. Then he started playing with my pink hair, which—just for him—I had allowed to grow down to my mid-back.

"So what are you gonna call her?" he said, staring at the ever-growing bulge in my stomach.

I smiled at him, and he seemed to know before I answered. "Tenten. Uchiha Tenten."

**~Fin.**


	9. Read This, HalfFlamers or Whatever U R

Hello.

To all you reviewers who think it is fun to insult this story, let me tell you I don't really give a shit.

If you've read the author's notes up to the last chapter that completed the story, then you should know I wrote this story like years ago, and being an idiot, I started posting it when I was only halfway done. I've learned since then that you should NEVER do that, because it forces you to be unable to revise anything. Not only that, but I also lost interest after it was done, and didn't want to revise anymore. However, it would be extremely rude to just stop updating all together when I have the whole story completely written. So I posted the chapters, and finished the story anyway, so those who actually enjoyed it weren't left hanging. I posted those chapters KNOWING they sucked, and said so repeatedly. If you're too stupid to understand that, then keep blatantly stating your dislike for this story. I couldn't care less, honestly. The only reason for this message is to THANK those of you who understood my problems with this story, and tried to enjoy it anyway--even offering little tadbits of advice, even though you knew I wasn't going to go back and fix anything. Thank you for that.

However, those of you who just are stating your hatred of this story. I don't give a damn--never will. Maybe if you had told me that when I was actually half-way through writing this, I would have listened (even though you "flamers" aren't really giving me any advice TO listen to). So give it up. Look at the update date, know that this story was completed actually a long time before that date, and know that you have so LITTLE significance in my life. I am NOT going to be all "oh my godddd, I have to go and change EVERYTHING now just because some idiot (who are mostly too cowardly to sign in and let me speak with directly) thinks it sucks.

Yea, if you think your insults matter to me that much, then you really need to get a life. I am NOT rewriting anything, and I am NOT deleting this story. There WERE people who enjoyed it; otherwise, I would delete it right here and now. If you can't deal with that, then ... wow, I'm sorry, get a life.

Thank you to all the other reviewers (and the ones who said something was wrong with this story, but in a nicer way, thank you, as well) for being understanding.

~Selena

EDIT: Thank you for all those new reviews. :) Very nice of you, even though it probably wasn't deserved. Also, to some of you who may think it was targeted at you--well, if you were sincerely being nice but honest when writing your review, I am not mad at all! Just the people who decided to ignore my warnings that the story sucked, read it anyway, and yelled at it. Thank you again.


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